Hurting
by tophetangel
Summary: COMPLETE! Despite everything, he will be right there when she needs him the most. Can he convince her its time to leave, without jepordizing his relationship with Karen? Season 3 - AU JAM. Rated M for some violence and adult themes.
1. Chapter 1 Fallen

**A/N - Ok, I have a CSI fic going, it's time to start an Office one as well!**

**I've been pretty fluffy lately, but I was in a very unfluffy mood when I came up with the idea for this fic. I was watching the scene where Pam tells Roy about kissing Jim and he goes nuts in the bar. So this is a season 3 AU fic. This will likely be changed to an M rating as the story progesses, so if you dont read M rated fics, I wouldn't recommend reading this one.**

**I swore I wasnt going to get into a long fic until after Logan was born, but I am going on maternity leave soon, and I am going to need to be writing to stay sane in the house a lone all day, now that my baby girl started pre-school. :(**

**Ok, now the obligitory blurb - I do not own the office, or it's characters. I also do not have a Beta. I do however have an impatient daughter, so be on the look out for rogue typos. :)**

**So here we go. Please enjoy, read, and review!**

* * *

Pam's hand shook as she dialed the numbers. She sighed when she heard her own voice through the receiver.

"You have reached the offices of Dunder Mifflin Scranton..."

She didn't wait for the beep.

She hung up and looked around her disheveled apartment. Before she lost her nerve, she picked up the phone again.

"Hello?"

She tried to force the words out, but she couldn't find her voice. _"Why did I call? This was a mistake."_ She thought. She was about to hang up when she heard his voice again.

"Pam? Are you there?"

She let out a ragged sigh. Her breath immediately caught in her throat.

He knew her better than anyone.

_He would know._

He would know something was wrong; simply from the way she sighed.

"Pam, what's wrong?"

_Damn him._

"Jim." The smallness of her voice surprised even her.

"Pam?" His voice was full of concern. She heard the sound of his car turning and instantly knew he had turned his car around.

"Jim, I fell. I need help."

"I'm headed your way! Are you bleeding? Is anything broken? Do you need to call 9-11?" His questions spilled endlessly as he wound his way through the streets of Scranton.

"No, nothing like that." Pam whispered. "But could you call Michael? I can't bring myself to do it."

"I will do that as soon as I get there, I'm not hanging up until I can see that you're ok."

"I think, I think, I just should go in, ya know, just in case, my head, my head hurts really bad." She hoped she was making sense. The pain radiating through her head was getting worse.

"I'm pulling into your lot, can you answer the door?"

"Yeah, I'm really fine Jim, I just, I just probably shouldn't be driving is all."

"Ok, meet me at the door."

She carefully picked herself up from her spot on the floor, careful not to look at herself in the mirror as she passed by.

She opened the door and crossed her arms as she waited.

"Pam!"

She looked up and gave a small smile as Jim jogged to the top of the stairs. She quickly used her hand to cover her bruised face when she saw his expression as he looked her up and down.

"Oh my God... Pam." He whispered as he gently tipped her chin up so he could get a better look.

"It's probably nothing, I just want to make sure." She whispered as she quickly hid her face again.

They stood there in silence for a few moments.

"I just have to get my purse and put on my shoes." Pam whispered and turned to lead him into the apartment.

As she shut the door behind them and walked back into the mess that was her apartment, she instantly regretted letting him follow her in.

She wasn't facing him but she knew he was scanning the room behind her, putting the pieces together.

"It's a mess, sorry." She said softly and disappeared into the kitchen.

"How did you fall?" His question was forceful, he couldn't help it, he knew her injuries were not caused by a simple accident.

"Oh, it's stupid really. The cat ran underfoot and I fell right in between the couch and coffee table. I landed face first on the coffee table."

"I thought you were a dog person." Jim asked, his voice void of emotion as he scanned the broken room.

Chills ran up her spine, she had never heard him use that tone.

"Umm, yeah, I am. But Roy, he adopted this kitten and found out he was allergic. He didn't want to bring him back to the pound, so I offered to take him." She appeared in the doorway, purse in hand. "He should be around here somewhere." She scanned the room pretending to look for the kitten she knew was hiding under the bed. "Colby? Colby baby?" She called out softly.

She stumbled a little as she came into the living room, carrying on the charade of the 'missing' cat.

"Whoa!" Jim was instantly at her side. "Let's go, I'll call Michael on the way." He led her to the door and held her steady as she fished her keys from her purse to lock the door.

After carefully navigating their way down the stairs and helping her into the car, Jim flipped opened his phone and dialed as he started pulling out of the lot.

"Dunder Mifflin! This is Kelly!"

"Hey Kelly, This is Jim..."

"Oh! Jim! Where are you? Dwight is fuming around the office saying something about young people and work ethic, Pam is late too."

"Yeah Kelly, I know, I'm with Pam right now."

"What?" Kelly looked up and quickly quieted her voice when she caught Karen's eye. "What are you doing _together?_"

"Kelly, Pam fell, I'm taking her to the hospital. Can you transfer me to Michael?" Jim was growing annoyed.

"Why didn't Roy just take her? I mean, I know they've only been back together for just a few weeks and all, but ya know, they were together ten years, I know he _has_ to be sleeping over there. I mean Pam plays it all prude-y prude and stuff, but I bet she's secretly..."

"Kelly!" Jim shouted, startling Pam. "Transfer me to Michael."

"Oh, he's totally in New York today, some big meeting with corporate."

"Why didn't you just say so?"

"I _just_ did, duh." Kelly rolled her eyes.

"Ok, Pam and I won't be in today, tell Toby what happened."

"Oh, I totally will, I was going to go back to the vending machines anyway for some of those baked chips, it's about time they put something healthy in those machines..."

"Kelly, I have to go, just tell Toby." Jim sighed and clicked his phone shut.

_"I know why Roy didn't take her..."_ He thought angrily as he peeked at Pam out of the corner of his eye. Her head was starting to bob slightly and reached over and shook her gently.

"Pam honey, you have to stay awake."

"I'm awake." She whispered as they pulled into the hospital.

* * *

Jim paced around the waiting room. It had been four hours and he still hadn't been allowed to go back to see her.

"Mr. Halpert?" The nurse appeared at the window. "We're getting ready to release her; we'll need you to come back for home care instructions."

Jim nodded and followed her directions through the ER and after a few wrong turns, had found Pam's room.

She smiled as he walked in. "They're letting me go home."

"Yes, _but only_ if she has someone with her." The doctor turned around from reading her chart. "She says she lives alone. She can't be alone tonight."

"I'll be fine." Pam whispered to Jim as he came to stand next to her bed.

"Pamela, you have a concussion, you need to be with someone tonight." The doctor scolded.

"She can come to my house; I will take care of her." Jim nodded at the doctor.

Pam sat up, a rush of emotion coming over her. "You can't. I mean it's a Friday night, I'm sure you have plans." She looked up at him as tears filled her eyes.

She'd forgotten about Karen. And from the look she received back, so had Jim.

"This is more important." He assured her.

After receiving careful instructions from the doctor and getting a prescription and a few supplies to help keep the scratches on Pam's bruised face clean, Jim wheeled Pam out to the car.

"I'm going to take the chair back, sit tight." He told her firmly as he shut the car door.

As he wheeled back to the door he pulled the phone from his pocket and sighed as he dialed Karen's number.

* * *

**So what do we think? Huh? HUH??**


	2. Chapter 2 Inclination

**A/N - Ok, I was going to work on this tonight and post tomorrow, but I got it finished this afternoon! I hope you guys like! **

**Reviews are my anti-drug!**

* * *

"Hello?"

"Uh, hey." Jim cleared his throat nervously.

"Where are you? Kelly keeps walking by giving me the strangest looks, and I overheard Angela telling Dwight Pam was hurt." Karen sighed.

"Oh, uh, Pam had a nasty fall this morning; she needed a ride to the ER."

"Why didn't Roy take her?" Karen asked accusingly.

"He'd already left for work; I was still in the car and was able to swing by."

"Ok, so why isn't Roy there now?"

"I don't know honestly." Jim shook his head. "But we're still here." He lied. "I called Toby and let him know, we're probably going to be here for a while. I think I'm going to have cancel our plans for tonight."

Jim heard an annoyed sigh on the other end of the line.

"Karen, we've been over this. Pam is just my friend, and she needs someone to be here at the hospital with her, so I'm going to stay." Jim winced, expecting an arrangement to be made for yet another long talk in the near future.

"That's fine." Karen grunted. "Tell her to feel better."

Jim opened his moth to respond but heard the click of the line going dead. "Well _that_ went well." He muttered as he headed back to the car.

* * *

"Damn thing!" Jim grunted as he tossed his garage opener onto the dashboard. "Guess we're parking in the lot." He smiled at Pam before pulling out and into the first available parking space.

He helped her out of the car and grabbed the bag they had stopped for at her apartment a few minutes earlier.

He helped her up the stairs and into his apartment. After getting her situated on the couch he grabbed the phone. "Is Chinese ok for lunch?" He asked.

"Yeah." Pam gave a meek smile. "I'll have sweet and sour chicken with white rice, and maybe an egg roll."

Jim nodded and made his way to the kitchen. He filled the teapot he had bought years ago, but never used, and set it on the stove as he placed his order.

"Yeah, delivery please. Yeah, 555-9636. Yes that's the correct address. I need two orders of sweet and sour chicken, an order of white rice, an order of chicken fried rice, two egg rolls and an order of chicken wings. Yeah...yeah...ok." He set the phone down and went to work finding a box of tea.

Pam sat silent on Jim's faded sofa, scanning his apartment. She hadn't been to his new place since his return for Stamford. Familiar beer signs and sports posters hung haphazardly on the wall, the large TV took up most of the wall opposite the sofa, a giant stack of DVDs and video games were piled directly to the right.

"Yeah, I'm not great with interior design." Jim smiled as he walked into the living room carrying a bottle of water and a cup of tea.

"Well, you saw my place." Pam smiled as she took the tea. The silence was deafening as she remembered the current state of her living room. "I really need to clean one of these days."

"Yeah, all the broken glass from the beer bottles is probably not safe." Jim told her, a hint of sarcasm, and anger, in his words.

"They were on the coffee table; I knocked them off when I fell." Pam said softly.

Jim grit his teeth. He'd only been in her apartment for a few minutes, but he had the entire scene burned into memory. The brown glass was everywhere. Telltale yellow stains on the wall had told them they'd been thrown.

"Lunch should be here in twenty minutes." He told her, going against his better judgment and not pressing the issue.

"Thanks." Pam nodded.

"So, do you wanna change or anything?" Jim asked handing her the bag she'd hurriedly packed.

"Oh, yeah. I guess I don't need to wear my work clothes all day." She whispered and took the bag and carefully stood up and made her way down the hall.

Jim ran his hands through his hair, pulling it lightly as he paced the room. _"Why is she lying to me? Why is still protecting him?"_ He shook his head, trying to get the nagging thoughts to vanish, but they lingered, taunting him.

He thought back a few years. Pam had dropped a stack of papers on the floor and as he helped her pick them up he spotted the purple and yellow mark on her forearm when she rolled up her sleeves.

"Roller blading accident." Jim remembered out loud.

He'd spotted the large finger sized bruise on the back of her neck one day when her hair shifted as she refilled the jelly beans.

"Fell against the coat rack hook." He sighed.

One week she called in three days in a row. When she returned she had face make up caked on her neck, claiming she'd tried out the Mary Kay products her sister was peddling.

"Had the flu that week." Jim grunted.

He recounted every time he'd spotted a bruise or cut, every time she's missed work, every excuse she'd given him over the years.

His blood was starting to boil.

He couldn't help it. They had been best friends. Screw the stupid crush and his feelings for her. He was her _best friend;_ she was supposed to be able to talk to him.

_"Well, it isn't like you reached out to her about it."_ He thought. _"You knew damn well something was going on, but once again you let it go, never took a stand, just like you've done with everything else in your entire life."_ He grunted and tousled his hair again.

"Calm down Halpert, the food will be here soon." Pam joked as she emerged from the hall; her hair swept up in a pony tail, wearing a faded Penn State t-shirt and a pair of blue flannel pants.

The sight of her standing there, in his apartment, in her pajamas was enough to cool his nerves. Despite of the reason she was there, just her being in his home in her pajamas was like a twisted little dream come true.

"You know I love my fortune cookies." He grinned as she found her spot on the couch again.

"So, what are we going to do all day?" Pam asked tenitively.

"Umm, I hadn't given much thought, other than ordering lunch." Jim smiled.

"We could watch your desert island movies." Pam offered.

Jim's face lit up. "That would be awesome. We can start with Dazed and Confused."

"Sounds like a plan." Pam smiled.

* * *

Jim clicked the TV off. Pam's steady breathing across the couch made him feel butterflies in his stomach. He carefully got off the couch, not wanting to wake Pam. He went to the closet and pulled out a light blanket.

He carefully covered and tucked her in. He gingerly moved a stray piece of hair from her face and smiled. He stood and was going to clean the empty cartons of Chinese food from the coffee table when he glanced out the window and saw a very angry Karen just outside the door, staring back at him.

He felt a sick plunge of stomach and walked to the door. He stepped outside and shut the door quietly behind him.

"What the hell Jim??" Karen yelled instantly.

"What are you doing here?"

"What am I doing here? What the hell is she doing here?"

The voices stirred Pam who peeked over the arm of the sofa but quickly ducked her head back down when she saw Karen.

"I told you, she fell." Jim said softly, not wanting to anger Karen any further.

"How does that equate to her being on your couch, with you tucking her in?" Karen crossed her arms. "I was driving home, I spotted your car in the parking lot and I thought I'd stop by to surprise you. Well SURPRISE, SURPRISE!"

"Karen, she has a concussion. She can't be left alone for twenty four hours."

"And how exactly does that fall on you??" Karen nearly screamed. "That is Roy's job! He's her boyfriend, NOT YOU!"

"Don't you think I know that??" Jim yelled, surprising Karen. "I think Roy did this! I think Roy's been hurting her! OK??"

There was silence.

Pam started to shake. "He knows." She tried to catch her breath. "He knows." She felt the hot wet tears before she realized she was crying.

Karen stood there, not knowing what to say. Jim ran his hands through his hair and started pacing.

"Well, now I just feel like an ass." Karen sighed, unfolding her arms.

"Don't." Jim stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her. "I know this looks bad. But she's my friend. If she needs help, I want to be there for her."

Karen leaned into Jim's chest and wrapped her arms around his waist. "I'm gonna head home. Do you need anything?"

"No." He whispered.

"Does Pam need anything?"

Her question surprised him. He kissed the top of her head and gently rubbed her back. "No, we stopped and got her some things. But thank you." He tipped her chin back and kissed her softly. "Thank you."

"See ya Halpert." Karen smiled meekly and made her way down the steps and to her car.

Pam quickly shut her eyes as Jim re-entered the apartment. She could feel him look at her as he made his way to the kitchen.

He hoped she wouldn't mind. But he needed a beer.


	3. Chapter 3 Escape

**A/N - I am so glad you guys are enjoying this! I just want to say a few things before I let you read this chapter. **

**I know there are a ton of Pam/Roy abuse stories out there, with Jim swooping in and playing hero... I am trying to make this one a little more realistic in how things will unfold and such... it's probably going to be a long, rough, journey, so I hope you're up for it. **

**I'm also glad you all are liking my depiction of Karen, she wasnt around terribly long, so its harder to get a good feel and read of her character. I think she is unfairly hated and is made out to be the bitch in so many fics, just because we all feel Jim and Pam _need_ to end up together... I dont think Karen was quite the devil she's made out to be... so I am very _very _happy to read you are liking my Karen...**

**Reviews are like Lays... I cant have just one :)**

* * *

Pam was thankful that Jim had finally decided to turn in. She fumbled around in the darkness of Jim's apartment, trying desperately to be quiet.

She knocked into the lamp and caught it before it had a chance to topple over. She held her breath and listened closely. She could still hear the faint sound of Jim's quiet snores, so she went on sneaking through the apartment.

She found her duffle bag and quickly shoved her purse inside. She zipped the bag and carefully tip toed to the front door, shutting it gingerly behind her before making her way down the stairs.

She was half way across the parking lot when she felt like she was being followed. She gripped the mace she kept attached to her key chain and turned around.

"Where the hell do you think you're going?"

Pam bit her lip and shuffled her feet. "I'm going home."

"No." Jim crossed his arms. "You're not."

"I just... I don't want to be any trouble." She sighed. "And I want to sleep in my own bed."

"Ok then, I'll drive you home." Jim nodded.

"Ok." Pam whispered.

"And I'll sleep on your couch." He told her as he led her back inside.

"Jim..."

"_Save it_." He snapped. "I don't wanna hear it."

Pam didn't know what to do. Jim was rarely ever angry with her, and she had never heard him use that tone with _anyone_ in all the years she'd known him. She was charting new territory and she didn't know how to handle it. She slowed and walked carefully behind Jim as he led her back to the building.

The smell of the beer hit her like a ton of bricks. She stopped suddenly and felt like she may be sick.

"Come on Pam, it's late." Jim said as he turned around.

"Pam?" His voice caught in his throat as he saw her standing there.

Her face was pale and the fear in her eyes sent shivers up his spine. _"Maybe being so firm with her was not a good idea."_ He thought as he walked back to where she stood.

She started to shake as he walked towards her. He didn't reek of alcohol like Roy did, but he'd been drinking; and now he was angry.

He reached out to move a strand of hair from her face but she instantly pulled back.

"Please don't! I'll do whatever you want!" She cried out, not able to stop herself.

Jim felt tears ready to fall and the bile rise in his throat.

Pam couldn't stop it, her body shook and the tear flowed endlessly. She dropped her bag and fell to her knees. She hugged herself tightly as she rocked back and forth.

Jim dropped to his knees in front of her, and carefully reached out for her again.

"No...please...don't..." She cried.

"Pam" He whispered softly. "I would never hurt you."

Pam shook her head. She knew Jim wouldn't hurt her, she knew it. He'd never hurt a soul, but she'd lost herself in the moment, the smell of beer on his breath, him reaching for her face, it all sent her right back to her tiny apartment that morning.

"Jim..." Her voice barely a whisper.

Jim carefully scooped her up and carried her back inside.

* * *

Pam cried uncontrollably as Jim rocked her softly in his lap.

"Shhhhhhhhhhh" Jim whispered trying to soothe her. "It's gonna be ok. I'm here."

"I'm...I'm sorry..." Pam sputtered through her tears,

"You have nothing to be sorry for Pam. I'm the one who should be apologizing."

"You're right."

"I know, and I'm sorry."

"No..." Pam sobbed. "You're right."

Jim shook his head, confused.

"You're right." She said again. "About Roy."

As Pam's sobs became louder, Jim tried to think straight.

_He wanted to protect her._

_He wanted to go out right then and there and find Roy and shoot him where he stood._

_He wanted to hold her, comfort her, and make her feel safe._

Jim tightened his grip and rocked her back and forth. "It's gonna be ok Pam, it's gonna be ok."

Suddenly Pam jumped up and starting pacing the room. She held out her hand to stop Jim from getting off the couch.

"Burned toast!" She muttered. "I burned the God damn toast!"

She stopped suddenly and pointed to her swollen face. "This is what I get for burning the toast!" She yelled.

Jim was frozen; he didn't know what to do. He wanted to sit and listen quietly, which he knew was what she needed most at that moment, the moment she decided to finally tell the truth. He didn't dare move, he didn't want her to lose the moment, but it took everything he had not to get off the couch and hold her in his arms.

"I apologized and apologized, it's a new toaster ya know... you have to do some trial and error."

She was flailing her arms as she walked, her hands moving violently with her words.

"Then suddenly it escalates into me being a worthless whore!"

She stopped suddenly and stared at Jim. "I need some air; I need to go for a walk." She sad flatly.

Jim simply nodded and helped her slip on his slippers while he threw on his shoes.

They had walked a few blocks in silence before Pam finally sighed and started speaking again.

"Like those whores he finds at the bar are the salt of the earth. How the hell does he justify calling _me_ a whore?"

"I don't know how Roy justifies anything he does." Jim whispered.

"He wasn't always like this you know." Pam sighed. "He wasn't always evil."

"So, why do you stay?" Jim whispered.

Pam stopped and stared up and him. "What?"

"Why do you stay with him?" He asked again.

Pam could see the tear stains that ran down his cheek, the redness in his eyes.

"I don't know." She said honestly.

"You need to leave him again. For good." Jim said softly, but firmly.

"Jim..."

"No!" Jim held his hand up. "You need to listen to me right now. Ok?"

Pam simply nodded.

"Pam, you know I care about you very much right?"

Another nod.

"Good." Jim nodded as he grabbed her hand and resumed their walk. "You're my best friend. You're my _best friend_, and I can't let this go on. I _can't_ let this happen. I can't send you back to him and wake up every day hoping I don't get another phone call. I can't send you back to him and worry about you _losing your life_."

Pam sniffled, fighting back the sobs that threatened to rise from her throat.

"I can't do that, _and I won't do it_." He stopped again and looked at her.

"I had my suspicions for years. _Years Pam_. I never sad a damn thing. I took your excuses at face value and tried to ignore the pain in my stomach that told me to probe further. I didn't want to lose you. I knew when the time was right you'd come to me; at least I'd hoped you would." He sighed heavily. "If I would have known it was escalating to this..." He softly caressed her swollen face. "I would have done something sooner."

"I didn't want anyone to know."

"I know Pam. I know." Jim wiped a stray tear that had escaped his eye. "But I can't send you back to _that_... so I have to take my stand right now, right here."

Pam looked up at him, scared of what was coming.

"I'm giving you an ultimatum." He said firmly, grabbing her shoulders and looking into her eyes. "You either leave him for good, and God Pam, I will be there every step of the way and I will help you any way I can... But if you choose to continue seeing him, I go back to being just a co-worker. I can't be your friend anymore if you stay with him. I won't watch him ruin life anymore."

There was silence.

Pam was torn. She knew breaking things off with Roy would be the hardest thing she'd ever have to do. She'd done it once already, and he'd nearly killed her, she knew if she did it again, this time he may finish what he started. But as she looked up at Jim, standing there in his pajamas in the middle of the night, trying desperately to help her... she knew she couldn't lose him. No matter what had happened in the last few years, he'd been there. He'd been her rock. She couldn't lose him.

"Ok." She whispered. "I'll leave him."

Jim wrapped around his arms around her carefully. She closed her eyes, and sighed. This was going to get bad.

This was going to get _very_ bad, _very_ quickly.


	4. Chapter 4 Honesty

**A/N - Ok..since I do not update on weekends, I made this chapter a bit longer to hold you over until then. This fic will probably turn into a M rating on Monday with chapter 5, and the return of Roy. **

**I hope you like, please let me know what you think!**

* * *

Pam sat up slowly, her face hot with pain.

It took her a few moments to get her bearings. She rubbed her eyes and realized she'd fallen asleep on the couch, leaning against Jim's shoulder.

Jim sat up and rubbed his shoulder. "You ok Beez?"

Pam let out a ragged sigh. It had been months since he's called her that.

"Mmhm." She moaned.

Jim quickly sat up and inspected her cheek. "It's a bit swollen."

Pam quickly gave him a dirty look.

"Well, a bit _more_ swollen." He sheepishly offered.

"Ermmmmm." Pam moaned and flopped the other way on the couch.

"I'll make you some tea and eggs." Jim offered. "You should be able to handle scrambled eggs with minimal chewing."

"Ahbil?"

"Yeah." Jim laughed softly. "I'll get you your Advil."

Jim was crossing the living room to retrieve Pam's meds when he was diverted by a soft knock at the door.

"Mornin' Halpert." Karen smiled.

"Hey." Jim greeted her with a kiss on her cheek.

Pam turned her head and rolled her eyes, instantly feeling guilty for doing so. She had no real reason not to like Karen, but she still didn't care for her all the same.

"Hey Pam, I brought you some soup." Karen stood next to her and held out a white bag.

Pam noted the label on the bag; it was from her favorite deli. _"Oh you're kidding me right?"_

"Shanks." Pam tried to smile, but brought her hand up to her face as the pain seared through her cheek.

"I was actually going to make her some eggs, once I get her some pain meds." Jim chimed in.

Pam quickly handed him the bag. "Lumph." She offered.

"Oh, yeah, we'll save it for lunch." He smiled.

"Need any help?" Karen asked as Jim disappeared into the kitchen.

"Yeah." Jim called back. "Can you fill the tea pot?"

"Sure!" Karen smiled and trailed in behind Jim.

_"Ugh, I get it, he's _**_yours_**_."_ Pam thought to herself as she lay back on the couch.

Laughter came from the kitchen and Pam grunted softly. _"Yeah, yeah, you're _**_happy_**_. You're in a fun happy relationship. _**_I get it_**_."_ She shook her head and then covered it with a ratty throw pillow to drown out the giggles for a few minutes.

"Here."

Pam sat up and carefully took a steaming mug from Karen.

"I'm heading out to NYC, to visit my sister." Karen told her. "I told Jim to take you home and spend the night with you again tonight."

_"Oh yes, you're in a fun, happy, _**_SECURE_**_ relationship! Damn, _**_lay off_**_."_ Pam thought as she stared up at Karen. She shook her head and muttered. "I'b be otay..."

"No seriously... Halpert is great with the pampering bit, and it would put us both at ease if someone was with you."

Pam was seething inside, but she managed to give a small nod. "Otay."

"Ok, I'm outta here Jim." Karen called into the kitchen.

Jim emerged wiping his hands on a small towel. "Drive safe ok." He leaned in and gave her a small kiss. "Call when you get there."

"I will." She smiled. "Bye Pam, feel better."

"Buh." Pam mumbled. _"_

_"Feel **better**?? Kiss my a..."_

Her thoughts were interrupted by Jim. "The eggs are almost ready."

"Mmm." Pam nodded.

"Oh! Your meds! I forgot, I'll go grab 'em." Jim smiled and jotted down the hall. "Can you check on the eggs?" He called back over the sound of pills jostling in a bottle.

Pam lifted herself off and toddled into the kitchen.

She gasped as she saw the slight smoke coming from the pan on the stove. She ran over and instantly panicked. She went to grab the pan, but the handle was too close to the flame and was incredibly hot.

She began opening and slamming drawers, searching desperately for pot holders.

As Jim rounded the corner she was already in tears and had given up on her search for pot holders. She grabbed the handle and threw the pan in the sink, letting out a muffled cry as the handle burned her skin. She immediately started dousing her burned fingers with cold water.

"Uhhhh!" Pam screamed as the water rushed over her charred skin.

"Pam! What happened?"

Panic set in again.

In her right mind she knew Jim wasn't Roy, she knew he was more concerned for her and her burn than he ever would be about a little ruined breakfast; but her logic had been reset long ago.

_Burning food equaled punishment._

Before she realized what she was doing, she was cowering in front of the sink covering her face with her forearms.

She felt instant relief and embarrassment when her mind snapped back and she realized it was Jim, and she needn't be afraid.

She sobbed as she held her arms out in front of her. Jim instantly kneeled down and pulled her into him.

"Jesus Christ Pam, what the hell did he do to you?" He was on the verge of tears.

He'd suspected Roy had been abusive, but Pam's behavior told him they weren't simply drunken fights or random arguements. Roy had broken her down into a shell of a person, afraid of every move she made, fearing for her safety. _Fearing for her life_.

This wasn't going to be as simple as he thought it would be. If she was going to leave Roy, he would have to take extreme measures to keep her safe.

He couldn't hold the tears back any longer. With a low sob, he let the tears fall freely.

* * *

He watched her chest rise and fall softly as she slept in his bed.

He glanced at the clock. It was nearly noon.

He had been trying to come up with a plan for Pam, but was struggling to understand the events of the previous twenty four hours. He wanted Pam to get away from Roy. He wanted her to be safe. That was the bottom line.

He just didn't know how to do it without causing complete chaos in their lives.

He felt Pam stir next to him and turned to look at her.

"Hey." He smiled.

"Hey." She smiled back.

"I see the meds kicked in."

"They did indeed. I can talk again."

"Good." Jim smiled.

"Listen..." Pam sighed. "About earlier..."

"We don't have to talk about it now." Jim smiled softly. "Unless you want to."

"I do... but maybe we can head to my place first. I need to take a shower." Pam told him. "And poor Colby, he's probably scared."

"Ok." Jim smiled and helped her up.

* * *

She turned the water on as hot as she could handle it.

She sighed as the water poured over her bruised body. As she ran her soapy hands over her purple skin she realized Jim didn't know about her other injuries. She hadn't told him at the hospital, fearing he would figure out her secret.

_"Well, now the secret was out. Nothing else to hide, right?"_

She stepped out of the shower and gently patted her skin dry. She pulled her wet hair up into a loose pony tail. She pulled on her shorts and opted for a sports bra. She grabbed a t shirt and walked out to the living room.

She stood behind the couch and smiled as she took in the sight before her.

He'd cleaned up the broken glass and had tried to reassemble her shattered apartment. The carpet was freshly vacuumed and she smelled a hint of bleach in the air.

She heard a laugh in the kitchen and she walked closer to the doorway.

"You sure were a hungry little guy weren't you?" She heard Jim's voice followed by a small meow.

"No more until we ask mommy."

Pam smiled and peeked her head around the corner. "He can have more wet food, he is a growing boy after all."

Jim readily opened another can and set the bowl back in front of the hungry kitten.

"Can I talk to you for a second?" Pam asked quietly as Jim leaned back against her counter top.

"Yeah." Jim smiled. "But do I get to talk to you? Or just your head?"

Pam chewed at her bottom lip. Jim's face fell a bit when he realized what she was doing. She only did that when she was apprehensive about something.

"What's the matter?" He asked softly.

She thought about dismissing it and just throwing her t-shirt on, but she knew there was no holding back now. They'd already come this far.

She slowly stepped into the doorway. She chewed her lip a bit harder and stared at her feet, afraid to look into his eyes.

It was quiet for a few moments. She waited anxiously for his response, but one didn't come. She slowly moved her gaze and broke into tears as she looked at him.

He had his face covered with his hands and was shaking hard from keeping his sobs within.

When he looked up, his face red and wet, his eyes glistening, he couldn't find the words to say to her. He looked at her with pleading eyes and she took a deep breath.

"It's nothing serious." She offered, wiping her tears away. "A few bruised ribs."

"God, Pam!" Jim's voice shook.

"I know it looks bad..."

"It doesn't just _look_ bad Pam!" He raised his voice, but it still shook as he spoke. "This _is_ bad!"

Pam rocked on her heels. She knew Jim well enough to know he was over flowing with emotion, and it need to spill. She braced herself as she heard him take a deep breath.

"How could you not tell me?" He wasn't yelling, instead, he was pleading with her. "You knew I was in love with you! You had an out!"

Pam winced at the words _was_ and _had_.

"I stood there. I stood there, and I opened my heart up to you. I came clean about everything I was feeling!"

He started to stare at the ceiling, trying hard to get a hold of his emotions.

"You chose to marry him. You chose _him_!"

"But I didn't marry him!" Pam pleaded. "I called your house and Mark told me about the transfer!"

"You had my cell phone number Pam... don't give me this bullshi..."

"Let me finish!" Pam yelled and was instantly quiet. She could never stand up to Roy or anyone else for that matter; she wondered where her sudden confidence was coming from.

"I thought you had made up your mind...and you didn't want me anymore. I spent that entire night curled up in a ball bawling my eyes out. No one wanted me!"

She suddenly remembered how exposed she was and threw on her t-shirt.

"I was nothing to Roy! I _still_ mean _nothing_ to him. I stayed because I was taken care of and I was scared of being alone. Then I made the biggest mistake of my life by telling you 'I can't', and then you were gone. You didn't want me anymore! I was alone and unwanted, like a piece of trash!"

Jim couldn't find the words to say. This situation was delicate and the wrong choice of words would send Pam out of his life and right back under Roy's fist.

A buzzing in his pocket brought him back from his thoughts.

Shit.

_Karen_.

"Hey." He tried to sound happy.

"Hey Halpert, I'm alive and well in NYC."

"Good, how was the drive?" He tried to play it cool, pacing the kitchen floor.

"Boring." Karen laughed. "How's Pam?"

"Good! She's taking a nap." He lied.

"Oh good. You guys going to have a low key day?"

He looked up at Pam and sighed to himself, nothing about this day was going to be low key. "Yup."

"Great, well we're about to have some lunch, I just wanted to check in. I'll you later. Love you."

"Love you too." And he clicked the phone shut.

The words cut through Pam like a knife. _I love you too._

It was quiet for a few moments.

"I know I'm a weak person..." Pam started.

"Don't." Jim growled. "Don't do that."

The silence between them was deafening.

"You are strong. I know you are. You have to find your strength again. I'll help you."

"I'm sorry I yelled." Pam started chewing her lip again.

"Pam." Jim wiped the remaining tears from his face. "We have a lot of issues we need to work through... This isn't going to be easy."

"I don't understand how I ended up like this." Pam sighed. "This isn't the way it was supposed to be."

"I know."

"So you love her?" Pam asked quietly.

"Ya know, I think we have enough issues to work through without getting into _that_." Jim scoffed.

"I don't want to make a mess of your life too..."

"It's a little too late for that Beez." Jim ran his hands through his hair absent mindedly. "I promised I'd be there for you. I promised I'd help you, and I'm going to. Both of our lives are now officially, royally, screwed up."

Pam crossed her arms and leaned against the door frame.

"I promised myself to be honest with you about everything. That's why I wanted to show you my stomach."

Jim felt instantly sick. For a moment he's forgotten about the bruises that covered Pam's body.

"You're going to be one hundred percent honest?"

"Yes."

"Ok." He sighed and leaned back against the fridge. "Tell me what happened yesterday."


	5. Chapter 5 Wrath

**A/N - Sorry for not getting this up yesterday as promised, Miss Maddie has strep throat, so I spent my day feeding her popsicles and watching Dora the Explorer. I have officially changed this to M rating, for language and violence.**

**I hope you all enjoy the return of Roy, he will be making an even bigger appearance in the next chapter.**

* * *

Pam took in a deep breath. "I told you, I burned the toast."

"Pam, you said you'd be honest with me." Jim rubbed his eyes in frustration. "I want the _whole_ story, start to finish."

Pam grimaced. Sometimes she hated how well Jim knew her.

She let out a heavy sigh. "Roy went out drinking Thursday night. He called, wanting to come here. I knew he was drunk, I knew I shouldn't let him come over, but he would have showed anyway and I didn't want him banging and screaming at the door, ya know? So he came over, and he wanted to..." She took a deep breath. "...well, you know." She stopped.

Jim leaned forward and stood up straight. His mouth twisted in anger and he cracked his knuckles.

"Well, I didn't want to... and he started throwing the beer bottles. I freaked out, I didn't want the neighbors to call the cops... so I just... gave in." She lifted her t-shirt and traced her bruises delicately with her fingers. "This is where he held me down..."

Jim swallowed the lump in his throat. "_Jesus_." He muttered as he suddenly made out the palm shaped bruises.

"He rolled off and fell asleep..." She continued. "In the morning, I made breakfast. The toast burned. I tried to toss it and make more but he walked in here and saw the toast and he flipped out."

Jim placed his hands on his hips and paced the length of the kitchen, waiting for her to continue.

"He hit me and told me I was a worthless whore. He asked how anyone could mess up something as simple as toast. He told me I'd make a lousy wife and I was lucky he stayed around. I apologized and went into the leaving room." Pam motioned behind her. "Apparently he wasn't done screaming at me, so he followed me in there. I told him we had to get ready for work. He told me to watch my mouth and he threw me down on the coffee table. I hit my face and was sorta knocked out... He must have just left for work after that."

Jim didn't know if he wanted to scream or cry.

"I got up and saw my purse next to me; he must have tossed it at me... I don't remember." She sighed. "I was just going to call in, but when I heard the answering machine I hung up... My face was killing me; I honestly thought something was broken..." She stopped and stared at Jim, making direct eye contact. "I knew I needed help, and I instinctively called you."

Jim stopped. He didn't know what to say, he just stared at her for a few moments before letting out a deep sigh, like he'd been holding his breath for years.

"I really wish you would have made that call a long time a go Pam."

"Me too." She whispered softly.

"I don't understand how I didn't know it had escalated to this." He motioned to her face.

"I hid it the best I could." Pam shrugged.

"No." Jim shook his head. "No... I thought I knew you. I thought I could read you."

"Jim..."

"How could I not see this? I should have known."

"Jim...doesn't."

"And why didn't you say something? Why didn't you let me help you?"

"I was ashamed Jim! I still am!" Pam raised her voice. "Do you know how humiliating this is to be standing here? Knowing that you _know_? Having to tell you all of this? I feel like a complete moron!"

"You shouldn't..."

"And Karen knows!" Pam threw her hands up. "You told her what you suspected before you even came to me about it!"

"Pam..."

"Stop. Just stop." Pam shook her head. "I know you two are... _in love_, or whatever... but you had no right to tell her. Not without asking me first!"

Jim was fuming. "You know what? Maybe it _was_ wrong to do that, but I can't take all of this onto my shoulders alone! I don't know what I'm doing here ok?" He yelled. "I promised to help you through this, but I don't know even where to begin to help you! You told me that story like it was no big deal. It was no big deal that he left you here without knowing if you're dead or alive! Like he's done it a million times before! How can you be so nonchalant about this? YOU have to be ready to get help to make this work! I can't help you if you don't want it!"

"I said I'd leave him! What else do you want Jim?"

"But is that what you really want? Or were you just trying to pacify me?"

"I made the choice to leave him because I can't lose _YOU_ ok??" Pam shouted. "Ok?! If it comes down to you or him, I CHOOSE YOU! OK?!"

Jim stopped and stared at Pam like she had two heads. _"Where the hell was this a year ago?"_ He asked himself.

"I made the mistake of choosing him last time... and now look at us!" She continued to shout. "We drifted apart; things are _still_ awkward and weird! I lost you once God damn it and I am NOT DOING IT AGAIN!"

"You tell me this now?" Jim shook his head and stared at her. "You should have said all this a year ago!"

"Don't you think I know that Jim? Don't you think I _know_ I missed my chance? Do you know how hard it is for me to realize you're in love with Karen now? That I missed my one shot at happiness??"

It was quiet in the kitchen as they both struggled for something to say.

"Listen." Pam started. "I don't care if I have to keep you in my life forever as just a friend... if I have to live with knowing you are never going to be with me... I want you in my life. In what capacity? It doesn't really matter... I just... _need you in my life_, ok?"

Jim tried to stop the emotional roller coaster flying through his head.

"I need to go for a drive. Will you be ok here for half an hour?" He whispered.

"Yeah." Pam whispered back, wiping a tear from her cheek.

"Lock the door when I leave. Carry the phone with you. Have your mace handy." He told her firmly as he walked into the living room.

"Ok." Pam whispered as she watched him snatch his car keys off the table and disappear out the door.

She locked the door behind and lay down on the couch to cry.

* * *

Jim made his way to the interstate. He wanted to think, and didn't want to be bothered the stop signs that were on every other corner in Scranton.

"She tells me this _now_?" He asked himself out loud.

"Where the hell does she get off trying to make me feel guilty about moving on after _she_ rejected _me_?"

He flipped the radio on and sighed.

"I have to help her... I still care about her... I still love her... But I love Karen too...how the hell is going to work?"

His thoughts were going a million miles a minute as he tried to make sense of the situation. Trying hard to comprehend the events of the last day.

"How could he do this to her? How did anyone not know? We should have known... the way he bosses her around. They way she always agrees to do what he wants... she was scared of him and none of us saw it."

"How am I going to handle this? She obviously has feeling for me... she obviously hates Karen...does she think I'm going to leave Karen? I can't leave Karen... I moved on... I moved on...Didn't I?"

He shook his head and took the next exit.

"I obviously still have feelings for her... But we had our chance... we missed it... we _have_ to move on. I am her _friend_. I am going to help her through this _as _her friend... I shouldn't even been thinking about this... I need to find a way to help her without throwing the question of _us_...there can be no us, I have Karen."

He crossed back across the freeway and got on the off ramp, heading back towards Scranton.

"Maybe she's jealous... Maybe it's hard for her to see me in a relationship when she's trying to get out of one... Maybe it's just hard for her to see." He reasoned.

"And she's angry and she's scared... maybe she doesn't even mean half the things she's saying... we all say things we don't mean when we're mad..."

He quickly exited back towards Scranton.

"I have to focus on keeping her safe, and getting her through this... that's all I need to do." He concluded as he pulled back into the lot.

He got of the car and turned back to lock it when he saw the familiar truck in the space next to him.

"Shit..." He yelled and ran towards Pam's door.

* * *

Pam lay on the couch for a few minutes when there was a knock at the door.

She stomped to the door and jerked it open, fully expecting to see Jim on the other side.

"Hey babe." Pam gave a forced smile.

"Cut the crap." Roy yelled, giving her shove. "I've been watching you all day." He growled as he came toward her. "Enjoying your little _love fest_ with Halpert?"

"It's not like that Roy..." Pam shook her head as she slowly backed up.

"Oh, is that a fact?" Roy grit his teeth as he slowly advanced on her. "Then tell me why I just watched him bring you home in your pajamas!"

Pam's foot caught on Jim's overnight and she toppled over, spilling out all of Jim's clothes and toiletries.

"Oh, I see we're planning a little slumber party..." Roy snipped and leaned down, pulling Pam upright by her neck.

"Roy... don't...please..." Pam struggled to breathe. "You're...hurting me..."

"Ahhhh, poor little Pammy..." Roy spat. "You never learn do you?"

Pam tried desperately to get free, but Roy's hands clinched harder around her throat.

"You aren't going anywhere!"

"Please..." Pam struggled to catch her breath.

"You are a worthless little whore, and you deserve everything I give you." Roy pushed her against the wall, the smell of whiskey hung in the air.

The odor of the hard liquor made Pam panic. "God, he's going to kill me...this is how I'm going to die." She thought as her vision began to blur.

She looked up at the blurry image of the angry face in front of her, she closed her eyes and thought. "If I'm going to die, I don't want Roy's face to be the last thing I see..."

She felt herself being lifted off the ground as she slipped into a blanket of darkness.


	6. Chapter 6 Vexatious

**A/N - Ok, I am promptly making up for promising you all a chapter yesterday and not delivering. So here is the chapter intended to be posted today. I will try to update consistantly, but as the due date grows closer, its harder and harder for me to sit here and type with out my feet blowing up on me... ahh they joys of pregnancy. Also, my fingers are swelling as well (Had to take off the ol' wedding ring today and put it on a chain! We're getting close!) so watch out for those typos.**

**Reviews help the feet swelling though... seriously. Try it.**

* * *

Jim ran into Pam's apartment, it was eerily quiet as he ran through the living room and into the kitchen, searching for Pam and Roy.

As he ran back into the living room, he heard the squealing of tires and saw Roy's truck barreling out of the parking lot.

"PAM?!" He ran down the hall. His heart jumped when he saw her feet poking out of her bedroom door.

"Pam!" He hurried to side and carefully rolled her over.

He noticed the small pool of blood on the floor first. He searched her face but didn't see any cuts. He reached into his pocket for his phone, moving her slightly. Her face slowly rolled towards the floor and small line of blood trickled from her mouth.

"Oh God..." Jim whispered.

"9-11, what's your emergency?"

"I need an ambulance; I need an ambulance at 670 Adams Avenue, apartment 3B."

"What's the emergency?"

"My friend...she's unconscious... we need help." Jim sputtered as he felt for a pulse.

"Sir, is she breathing?"

"Yes... but it's labored..."

"Can you tell me what happened sir?"

"No... I wasn't here... I was only gone twenty minutes... tops..."

"Does she have any medical conditions you're aware of sir?"

"No. This was no accident... he did this, he did this to her..."

"Who? Who did this?"

"Her boyfriend." Jim cringed at the word. "She's bleeding from her mouth... Please hurry!"

"Sir, the ambulance is in route." The dispatcher assured him. "Has the boyfriend been violent in the past?"

"Yes... I was helping her leave him. He beat her up pretty bad, and she's been with me, I've been taking care of her... I only left her alone for twenty-minutes..."

"Scranton Police Department!"

Jim turned his head and called down the hall. "We're down here!"

"Sir are the police at the scene?"

"Yes..."

"I'm going to hang up now, they will take over."

"Thank you..." Jim mumbled and threw his phone down.

Jim watched as one officer quickly took Pam's vitals and relayed them to the other.

After what seemed like hours the EMTs arrived and began loading Pam onto a stretcher.

"Sir, can you tell me what happened?" The younger officer asked.

"Her boyfriend... he beat her pretty bad yesterday morning. She called me and I took her to the hospital... I've been staying with her... I was going to help her leave... She and I argued a bit, and I went for a drive...I was only gone for twenty minutes...when I came back, his truck was in the lot."

"The boyfriend's truck?"

"Yes... Roy Anderson..." Jim rattled off the make and model information for the officer, never taking his eyes off Pam.

"Do you know where he lives?"

"Somewhere on Saint Francis I think... those gray apartments maybe..."

"Ok, anything else?" The officer looked up from his notes.

"He's been doing this to her for years... she was finally going to leave him."

"When Miss Beesly waked up we'll talk about the details, talk about an arrest and a T.R.O."

"T.R.O?" Jim looked away from Pam for a moment.

"Temporary restraining order." The officer offered a half hearted smiled.

"Thanks." Jim nodded.

"We're going to take her in." The EMT told the officer as the stretcher wheeled past them.

"Can I go with her?" Jim asked meekly.

"We can take you down once we're done." The older officer stepped over. "We have to process the scene, take photographs and collect some evidence...If we make an arrest, we want a conviction. Domestic abuse cases are notoriously hard to prosecute if there is a lack of evidence."

Jim nodded and sank down the wall and pulled his knees to his chest.

He watched the officers snapped picture after picture. The shock was staring to wear off and he could taste the tears in the back of his throat.

His thoughts were cloudy. Had she said yes to him that warm spring night a year ago, all of this could have been avoided. He could have helped her... it would have been less complicated then. They could have gone to Stamford together... they could have made a run of it. There would be no issue of their feelings. They wouldn't have argued like they had this morning. _If she would have only said I love you back..._

"Son?"

Jim looked up at the older officer. "Hmm"

"We're done. We can take you to the hospital now."

"Ok." Jim wiped his tears with the back of his hand and stood up. He snatched his phone, Pam's purse and keys and locked the door behind him as they left.

* * *

Jim wrung his hands as he waited for the officers to get information on Pam. He hated hospitals. The sickening sterile smell. The bright white corridors.

"Mr. Halpert?"

Jim turned anxiously when he heard the officer's voice. "Yeah?"

"Ms. Beesly is in surgery. There is a small waiting room on the fifth floor. She'll recover up there."

"O...ok." Jim's mind was going nonstop. _Surgery_. He'd hurt her enough that she was being cut open in _surgery_.

"The nursing staff knows you're here. They will keep you updated."

"Thanks." Jim nodded.

"Take care of her son!" The other officer called after him as he raced for the elevators.

* * *

The wait was excruciating.

He had thought about calling her mother. He decided against it, wanting Pam to call her when she was awake. She needed to be the one to tell her family.

He'd tracked down David Wallace's home number and explained the situation. He didn't want anyone other than Toby to know specifics, but he would need a week of personal time to sort everything out. Luckily the CFO had quickly agreed that was the best thing for the time being and assured him Michael would be out of the loop as long as possible.

That left only one call to make.

"Hey Halpert! How's it going?" Karen's chipper greeting made a lump form in his throat.

"Uh, hey... not well actually." Jim sighed.

"What's going on?"

"I can't go into it right now, but Pam's in surgery. I took this next week from work, I talked to Wallace. I need to get Pam out of her place and somewhere safe."

"Whoa...wait, what am I missing here?" Karen's voice was suddenly full of concern.

"I left for a little bit this morning and Roy... Roy came back. The police are looking for him as we speak."

"Do you need me to come back?"

"No... She isn't exactly thrilled that I told you, it would probably be best if I was the only one here for her when she wakes up."

"Oh. Well, ok." She sounded hurt. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon. I'll call you when I'm back in P.A."

"Ok." Jim sighed. "Oh, and Karen?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you for being so understanding with all of this... it means a lot to me."

"Of course Jim...take care of her, and yourself. I'll call you tomorrow. I love you."

"Love you too..."

"Bye."

Jim clicked his phone shut as a nurse entered the tiny waiting room.

"Mr. Halpert?"

"Yeah!" Jim jumped up to greet her.

"Ms. Beesly is out of surgery, she is being moved to a recovery room. It will still be another hour or so until you'll be allowed in."

"What happened? Why did she need surgery?"

The nurse anxiously shuffled her feet.

"What did he do to her?" Jim asked, afraid to hear the answer.

"We removed a diamond ring from her stomach. It made a tiny hole in her esophagus, we repaired it. She should make a full recovery, but it may be difficult for her to speak for a few days."

"He may try to come here... did the police..."

"The officers explained the situation briefly. We will make sure he doesn't make it as far as her room."

"I can wait here then?" Jim asked quietly as he sat back down.

"Yes." The nurse nodded. "Can I get you anything? Water, coffee, juice?"

"No thank you." Jim whispered as the tears began to fall. After the last few days, he was almost surprised that he had any tears left to cry.

"I'll come get you when she's awake." The nurse told him before hurrying down the hall.

* * *

He didn't know where he was going. He knew he had to get the hell out of town. Halpert would surely get the cops involved. Play the part of hero.

He was trying desperately not to swerve, to keep the truck in between the lines. He was failing miserably and decided to just get off the road. He automatically turned into the Dunder Mifflin parking lot, but parked his truck in the back of the building. He remembered the bottle under the seat, and snatched it out as he exited the truck. He quickly jumped the fence and found a dumpster to shield him from the street as he sat in the back of the junkyard, out of reach of the dogs.

He took a long, hard pull from the bottle and looked up into the sky, watching the clouds go by.

"I don't know why I do that..." He thought to himself. "Why does she always have to piss me off?"

"She deserves it; she brings it all on herself. What am I supposed to do when I see her getting out of his car? Let her think that's ok?"

He took another swig, the whiskey burning his throat on the way down.

"She's probably been screwing around with him for years...right under my nose."

"How dare she? After all I've done for her. Ungrateful bitch."

He made short work of the bottle of Jack Daniels. He tossed the empty bottle to the side.

He knew he'd regret what he'd done as soon as he sobered up. He always did. He'd apologize and get her a little gift and they'd move on together... they always had.

He stood up and wobbled his way to the fence. He quickly hid behind the dumpster when he saw a squad car pull into the business park.

He heard the door slam and tried to make out words from the muffled voices.

"This has to be it. Same make and model... in the parking lot of their employer?"

"Run the plates Frank. We're looking for a _Royce Anderson_."

"Shit." Roy growled. "If that bitch called the cops..." He stopped and he could feel the anger rise through his body.

"Halpert."


	7. Chapter 7 Veracity

**A/N - Ok, I am officially calling this a 'filler' chapter... It isnt moving the story along too much, but I think the stuff that happens in this chapter needs to be out there. Plus I was able to write it out quickly, before I head down for my ultrasound. (Getting a 4D today! I get to see Logi's face!! AHHH, Im so excited you guys!!) **

**So, let me know what you think, and I am also interested what you guys think about where this is going, compared to how you think it should go... (I know my regs lulupanda and ktface3 will, thank you guys for sticking this out with me!) But for those of you who are reading and not reviewing (Yeah that's right, I see you...) Here's your chance to chime in!!**

**Dont make me do a ransom... I am so not above that!**

* * *

Jim ran his thumb gently over Pam's knuckles as he held her hand. She was still groggy from the anesthesia and was in an out of sleep.

He felt his eyes grow heavy and he laid his head on the bed, struggling to stay awake.

He felt the sensation of someone tickling his neck and he looked up to see Pam staring back at him.

Pam motioned to her throat and looked to him for explanation.

"They had to remove your engagement ring from your stomach. It punctured your esophagus; it may be hard to talk for a while." Jim whispered.

A tear slipped from Pam's eye as she looked under the blanket to find a small incision on her side. She quickly motioned for a pen and Jim quickly grabbed the pen and pad the nurse had graciously left by the bedside table.

Pam quickly scribbled. _I think I remember Roy telling me to 'choke on it'._

Jim's lip quivered as he read her words.

"I'm so sorry Pam, I shouldn't have left."

Pam shook her head and wrote as quickly as she could_. He was watching us. He was waiting. You would have had to leave eventually._

"I promised I'd keep you safe..." Jim shook his head. "I failed you."

Pam thought for a moment before scribbling again. _You have __never__ failed me._

Jim looked at Pam laying there helpless in her hospital bed. He remembered a time when he would imagine a moment like this. Only in his mind Pam was laying in the hospital bed with a gleaming smile, a newborn in her arms.

He'd thought they'd put everything out on the table, all the cards had been dealt. They'd promised to be honest with each other, and they had been. But in this moment, in was time to be open and frank. It was time to hold nothing back. He took in a deep breath before beginning to speak.

"Pam. I have some things I need to say."

Pam nodded softly and relaxed into her pillow.

"I still love you. I think you know that."

Pam slowly nodded.

"You don't know how badly I want to just pack you up and move you in with me; keep you safe all the time."

Pam nodded and her eyes filled up with tears.

"But I promised myself I'd give Karen a fair shake, ya know?"

Pam nodded again, a tear staining her cheek.

"I don't know how to help you without making things complicated with Karen."

Pam sighed. _"Oh God, this is it, I'm losing him forever..."_ She thought, unable to hold any more tears back.

"But, we'll have to find a way... I promised to help you, and Halperts never go back on their word."

Pam shook her head and started writing. _You don't have to do this. I'm not your responsibility._

"Pam..."

Pam held her hand and went back to her pad._I love you__. I think you know that too._

Jim nodded his head and wiped a tear from his cheek.

_It's going to be hard for me to get through this not wanting to be with you every moment I can... I don't think I can control it. I don't think anyone can control a love like this. I don't want to cause any problems with you and Karen. You should get up and walk out of here right now._

Jim shook his head. "See, I can't do that Beesly. I would hate myself for the rest of my life if I did that."

Pam frowned. _I'm not your problem; you shouldn't have to deal with this. I'm sorry I brought you into this._

"Well I'm not." Jim shook his head. "I'm sorry it took you so long to open up to me, but you calling me yesterday morning was the bravest thing you've ever done. That wasn't a mistake, and you shouldn't be sorry about that."

Pam chewed on her bottom lip as she wrote. _How did we screw this up so badly?_

"We both have bad timing I guess." Jim half smiled.

Pam shook her head as she wrote. _It isn't about timing, it's about __my__ stupidity. I should have told you how I felt a year a go. I guess I'm the one who screwed this up._

"We both made mistakes, blame doesn't fall on just you, it falls on both of us..." Jim drifted off, thinking about the choices they had both made over the years. He looked up as Pam handed him the pad of paper.

_I'm tired. Go eat something while I nap. I love you._

Jim looked up, but Pam had already closed her eyes and was going back to sleep. He decided to take her suggestion and decided to go to the cafeteria.

* * *

Jim picked at his spaghetti. He'd eaten a little, but didn't have much of an appetite. He had so much going through his mind, and had no one to talk to about it. If something was bothering him he would talk to Pam and, eventually, Karen.

Now that he found himself in a weird little love triangle, he had no where to turn. No one he could think of would be subjective. His brother would tell him to pick Pam, he'd never cared for Karen, he didn't think she was suited for his baby brother. His mom would tell him to pick Karen, after seeing Pam break her son's heart on her television screen, she'd been nagging Jim to move on and find someone new. She'd been thrilled when he started dating Karen. His father would tell him to follow his heart, do what he thought was right; his usual advice, which had always served Jim well, but at this point his heart was going in two different directions and his father's advice would be of no use.

Pam, the girl of his dreams, the girl he'd pined after for years was finally admitting how she felt, that she loved him back. He'd waited so long for her to say, or in this case, write; I love you back to him.

Karen, the girl he'd learned to love, the one who was there for him, the girl that never said 'I can't'. The one who was so understanding, the one who trusted him.

As he dumped his tray he wondered how the hell he would get through this without losing one, or _both_ of them in the process.

* * *

As soon as the door closed Pam opened her eyes again. After laying it all out there she needed time to think. She was grateful Jim had taken her suggestion and had in fact gone in search of food.

"God, Pam, what the hell did you get yourself into now?" She wondered to herself.

She had wanted so badly to say I love you that night, the night Jim finally opened up to her. But things were going ok with Roy at that point. The wedding date was set; she was so busy with planning the arguments were kept at a minimum. Roy had been controlling himself; she thought maybe he was changing for the better. Now, looking back, she realized he didn't want her to be bruised and risk anyone finding out.

She fought her heart that night; she told him she couldn't, even though she knew she should. She'd regretted the decision the minute the office door closed. She'd even run to the door, she'd almost gone after him.

He came back with Karen. He came back with someone and Pam's future went right back out the window. She knew it was a mistake to take Roy back, she knew he'd been drinking again. Hell, he'd even got a DWI. She knew it would be a mistake, but she went back anyway, she didn't want to be alone forever.

Now there she was. Lying in a hospital bed, unable to speak because of the abuse she'd endured. She couldn't even tell Jim she loved him, she had to write it on a stupid piece of paper.

"How did I screw up my life so badly?" She thought as the tears poured from her eyes. She cried harder, sobs unable to escape her throat. Soon she was struggling for air. She searched desperately for the call light, but it had fallen to the floor. She tried not to panic, but she couldn't stop it.

* * *

Jim opened the door and immediately screamed for a nurse as Pam thrashed in the bed, trying to breathe.

Within seconds the nurses and doctors had flooded the room, and Pam laid there, an oxygen mask over her mouth, finally catching her breath, finally able to breathe.

The staff cleared out, leaving one nurse behind.

"Ms. Beesly. I'm Grace; we're going to leave you on some light oxygen ok? Help you breathe."

Pam nodded. She reached out for the pad, Jim quickly handed it to her.

She showed the nurse her note. _When will I be able to go home?_

"If you do ok, you can go home as early as tomorrow evening. Provided your breathing gets better." Grace smiled.

"That soon?" Jim questioned. "That doesn't seem right."

"I assure you, we won't send her home any sooner than she can handle."

"Ok." Jim nodded as Grave left.

"Well, change of plans then." Jim grabbed Pam's hand and looked her in the eyes. "I'm going to go to your house, get you some clothes and other necessities. I'll pack up all of Colby's stuff and bring him with too. You're going to have to stay with me until you're better."

Pam's eyes grew large as she listened to Jim's plan. She looked up at him, worried.

"I will bring Mark, don't worry about Roy." Jim assured her. "And as far as Karen... Well, we'll cross that bridge..."

Pam slowly nodded, reluctant to agree to Jim's plan.

"Do you want me to call your mom? I mean, maybe you'd rather stay with her."

Pam quickly shook her head and scribbled on her pad. _No! Don't tell my mom!_

"Ok, I won't... I just wanted to make sure..." Jim leaned down and kissed her forehead. "I hate to leave you, but I figure Roy is probably sleeping it off right now and it's the best window of time to go get Colby and your stuff."

Pam forced a whisper. "Its ok... go."

It took Jim everything he had not to move her oxygen mask and kiss her before he left. "That would be a _very _bad idea." He told himself as he made his way down the hall to call Mark for a ride.


	8. Chapter 8 Tenatious

**A/N - Ok, I wanted to continue on with this chapter, and make it a bit longer, but Maddie isnt going to let me. In fact I bought the time to actually get on the computer and post this by giving her a bowl of ice cream. (She had breakfast...what's the harm...right?) But, my mom is taking her tonight, so I can say with confidence I will add a chapter tomorrow before the weekend. **

**Oh - and I saw my little Logan yesterday! He has a _ton_ of hair!! Maddie was a baldy, so I am quite excited! My little guy looks so much like his daddy! I am so exicted to meet him next month!! (The baby, not the daddy, I know where my baby daddy is...I swear! ) -- My husband will kill me when sees I called him that... :) hehe**

**Reviews are awesome. I see you looking. Push the little purple button at the bottom of the page... C'mon...do it! I double dog dare ya!**

* * *

Jim explained what he could of the situation to Mark, who immediately offered to help and was quickly on his way to the hospital to pick up a very emotional Jim.

Jim sat on the bench just outside the sliding doors and looked up into the sky. It was cloudy and gray, but the sun tried to poke through. "God, I hope that's a sign."

He was exhausted. The last few days had been a roller coaster ride from hell. He had found himself in a complicated situation that had only proved to be more and more complicated as time passed. He was almost afraid of tomorrow.

He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees, putting his head in his hands. "How am I supposed to take care of her, and not be with her?" He thought to himself. "How do I do this knowing we _both _have feelings for each other? How am I supposed to maintain a decent relationship with Karen during all this?"

He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. "And now, I'm moving her in with me until I know she's safe... what the hell was I thinking? I should have called her mother... How the hell am I going to get through this?"

The small honk of a horn made him look up. He smiled when he saw Mark pulling up.

"Hey! Thanks man!" Jim smiled as he got in the car.

"No problem." Mark nodded. "How's she doing?"

"She had a little trouble with her breathing, but they have her on oxygen now, she should be getting out soon, that's why I have to get her stuff; she has to stay with me until we get this whole Roy thing fixed."

"And how is Filipelli handling this?"

Jim looked at Mark and sighed.

"Dude, I had to ask, this is..."

"Weird?" Jim offered.

"Yeah." Mark nodded.

"Karen's been cool. Once I told her about Roy, she's been really supportive of me helping Pam through this."

Mark studied his friend's face for a moment. "You haven't told her Pam is staying with you yet, have you?"

"Nope." Jim shook his head and sighed. "She comes back from New York tomorrow, I'll tell her in person."

"When she shows up at your place and finds Pam staying there?"

"You're not helping."

"Well, c'mon man. I know Karen is being supportive, but how much do you really think she's gonna take? She knows about your history with Pam. You can only expect her to understand so much."

"You're _really_ not helping man."

"Hey, I'm your friend, you know that. I like to think I know you pretty well..."

"And what does that mean?"

"Jim... would you do this for Kelly? Angela? That goofy redhead...Wendy?"

"Meredith."

"Yeah. Would you do this for Meredith?"

"That's different and you know it."

Mark shook his head. "I do know that you're going to be living with 'the girl of your dreams', as you've called her so many times over the years, being her knight in shining armor. You don't think this spells trouble with a capital T?"

"This is insanely complicated, I know that. But I have to help her through this. Are you going to help me or not?" Jim raised his voice a little.

"Of course I will, I just want you to know what you're getting into man."

"Mark. I am _painfully_ aware of what I'm getting myself into."

"Fair enough." Mark sighed as he pulled into Pam's lot.

* * *

Pam stared at the ceiling.

"Karma is a bitch." She sighed to herself. A year ago he'd been there, heart in his hands and she chose to stay with Roy. Now here she was, raw and open, and he was choosing to stay with Karen. "Yep. A total bitch."

She closed her eyes and tried not to cry as she drifted back to sleep.

_She saw his face, warm and caring as he snatched a jelly bean from the jar and leaned over the reception desk to kiss her cheek. When he pulled back, his face had become Roy's. Angry and twisted. She stood up, but the office was empty. There was no one there to save her. Roy reached across the desk and pulled her up, throwing her across the room. She landed on Jim's desk, pain radiating her entire body. He pushed himself on top of her, tearing at her clothes. She tried to knock him off, but he was too big, and her strength was fading. She called out for him, but he wasn't there to save her. No one was there to save her._

She woke up with a start and looked around the room frantically. She remembered that Jim had gone to get her things and she laid her head back down, trying to catching her breath.

* * *

"Ok, I found a suitcase." Mark shouted as he dug through the hall closet.

"Great!" Jim smiled, placing the cat carrier next to bags of cat supplies. Colby gave a small meow, clearly not happy to be in the cage.

"I thought Pam was a dog person?" Mark asked as he pulling another suit case from the closet.

"Yeah, she is, but this little guy is pretty cool." Jim wiggled his finger at the unhappy kitten.

"Ok, I'm going to let you take of gathering the clothes." Mark rolled over the two suit cases. "I'll pack up the bathroom and toss anything from the fridge that will spoil in the next week or so."

Jim smiled. "Really, thanks for doing this. I appreciate it more than you know."

"Don't get all Hallmark on me Halpert, let's get this done before Roy shows up and shoots us or something."

Jim shook his head and went back to the bedroom.

He dumped the sock and underwear drawer into the smaller bag, not wanting to pick through all of Pam's belongings. He quickly packed pajamas and any comfortable casual clothes he could find into the larger bag. He grabbed her pillow and comforter and rolled everything out into the living room.

He did a final sweep of the bedroom, not wanting to miss anything. He spotted her sketch book and grabbed it from the night stand. He was heading back out the door when curiosity got the best of him and he sat down to flip through the book.

There were some landscape sketches, a sketch of her little blue car, one of the Dunder Mifflin logo. There was a sketch of her desk, one of the conference room - filled with people, including Stanly and a crossword puzzle that was half completed.

His breath caught in his throat as he looked at an image of himself sketched on the page. It wasn't anything spectacular. Just a sketch of him at his desk, talking on the phone; but it was the most amazing thing he'd ever seen. She'd captured _everything_. The mess of his desk, his messenger bag slung across his chair, the half empty coffee cup, even the little stain on his tie. She'd captured it all.

He held back the tears as he imagined her feverishly sketching the outline as he spoke on the phone, spending the rest of the day shading and sketching that moment in time forever.

He quickly closed the sketch book. "Nope, I can't do this. I can't do this again." He shook head and made his way out of the room.

"I think I got everything." Mark told him as he stashed the sketchbook in a bag.

"Let's haul this out." Jim grabbed her suitcases and they left to load the car.

After a few trips Jim grabbed the cat carrier and did a once over of the apartment before leaving and locking the door behind him. This was it. Pam was really going to be staying with him.

* * *

He watched as Jim made his way to his car, cat carrier in hand.

"I gave her that fucking cat. It should go to me." Roy grunted.

"You're allergic, what the hell are you gonna do with a cat?" Kenny asked, chewing on a piece of jerky.

"That isn't the point. It's the principle." Roy shook his head.

"Why are we doing this? Why don't you just apologize to her, she'll drop any charges, and just leave her the hell alone."

"You know what Kenny, you're supposed to be standing by me, you're my brother."

"Yeah well standing by you means I'm an accomplice and we'll be bonding night and day in cell at the Lackawanna county jail."

"Shut up and follow them." Roy yelled as he watched Jim pull out of the lot.

* * *

Worried meows came from the passenger seat and Jim reached his hand over, poking a finger inside the cage. "It's ok, we'll be there soon, you'll like my place, there's a window seat you can lay in." He said softly. He smiled as he came to a stop sign, but the smile faded as he saw who pulled up behind him.

He pulled away as casually as he could, taking a left instead of the right that would lead him to his apartment. He reached down and dialed 9-11 on his cell phone, clicking speaker phone to keep the phone out of sight of Roy and Kenny.

"9-11 what's your emergency?"

"I'm being followed by a man you're looking for in connection to a domestic abuse case. I can't stop; I don't know what he'll do." Jim yelled, so the dispatcher could hear him.

"What's the name of the suspect sir?"

"Roy Anderson. He's with his brother. They are in a maroon Dodge Ram, and we're heading east on Mulberry Street."

"Ok sir, I have a squad in route, the officer will pull Mr. Anderson over, we ask that you do not stop."

"Ok." Jim looked up, Roy and Kenny still trailing behind.

"When the officer pulls them over, I will ask you to stop further up the road, another squad will come to take your statement."

"Ok." Jim checked his rearview again; thankfully Kenny was keeping a distance between them.

A few moments later the sound of sirens blared and Jim was able to take a sigh of relief. He watched triumphantly as the truck was pulled over.

"Ok, they're stopped. I'm going to stop at the gas station at the intersection of Mulberry and Harrison."

"Thank you sir, an officer will be along shortly."

Jim hung up and sighed as he pulled into the station, anxious to hear the news on what would happen to Roy.


	9. Chapter 9 Transposition

**A/N - Ok, now we're moving along inthis chapter! I hope you guys like it! I will try my hardest to have chapter 10 up on monday!**

**Some of you have confessed to your lurking sins and have reviewed... Don't think I still don't see the rest of you! :) Reviews make my day!**

* * *

Jim was anxious to get home after giving his statement to the police. He was relieved to learn that Roy was arrested and would be held until his bail hearing Monday afternoon.

With a new sense of comfort he climbed back into his Saab and made his way to his apartment.

He quickly unloaded everything and made space for Pam's clothes in his closet. He set her shampoo in the bathroom and set up the rest of her toiletries on the vanity.

He finally set about setting up the litter box and getting Colby's food ready. When he was done he knelt on the floor in front of the cat carrier. "Welcome to Hotel Halpert little buddy, I hope you enjoy your stay." He whispered as he opened the door.

Colby made quick work in exploring the living room and trotted down the hall. Jim laughed as he watched him disappear into the bedroom.

Once he felt everything was done he grabbed his keys and made his way back to the hospital.

* * *

After a stop at the gift shop, Jim made his way back to Pam's room. He was surprised to see her sitting up when he entered the room.

"Hey Beez." He smiled, handing over the bouquet of flowers he was holding.

She offered a smile back and mouthed a thank you.

"You look better without the oxygen mask." He smiled.

Pam grabbed her pad and pen and scribbled. '_I feel better already, I even got a cup of ice chips.'_

Jim smiled. "I have good news."

Pam cocked her head to the side with a small smile.

"Roy was arrested. He'll be held until the bail hearing on Monday afternoon."

Pam quickly drew a question mark on her paper.

"When I left your house, I noticed he was following me, Kenny was driving."

Pam frowned.

"I called the police, and they pulled them over and arrested Roy."

Pam smiled as she wrote. _"Thank you. Thank you for everything."_

"No problem Beez." Jim grinned. "I also grabbed you some clothes, pajamas, your shampoo, and I have Colby all set up at my place, he seems to like it."

Pam smiled at him. She didn't need to write anything down, he knew what she could say if she could. He loved that after all they'd been through; he could still communicate with her without using words.

"It was no big deal Beez. I'll be happy to have you... Of course we're going to need to rent a ton of movies, or I'm going to have to teach you how to play _Call of Duty_."

Pam sighed.

_"Shit, I had to bring up Call of Duty didn't I?"_ Jim thought.

He knew he shouldn't be afraid to make references to Stamford, or Karen, if they were going to make it through this, Pam was going to have to get used to Karen being around; but it was still hard to watch the pang of sadness in her eyes whenever he spoke of Karen.

"I will of course also need to stock the fridge with lots of popsicles." He grinned, changing the subject.

Pam nodded and smiled softly back at him. This was going to be a hard week, and she hoped she would be ready for it.

* * *

Jim stretched in the uncomfortable chair in the corner of Pam's room. All the cots were in use, and despite Pam's repeated requests that he go home, he wanted to stay there with her.

He glanced at the clock; it was almost two in the morning. Pam was fast asleep so he quietly got up, intending to go to the vending machines for a snack.

Jim walked past the slight hum of the machines and through the lobby. He walked outside and the change in temperature caused Goosebumps to form on his arms. He rubbed them away and walked slowly out past the parking lot and down the quiet street.

He thought of the walk he'd just taken with Pam, when he told her she had to leave Roy or lose their friendship forever. He knew it was the right thing to do, he knew Pam had made the right choice. He just didn't think it would turn into this. Pam in the hospital and Roy sitting in the county jail.

_'Its funny the difference a day can make'_ he thought as he wandered down the street.

He made it to the end of the road and turned back for the hospital. He thought of Pam and her clothes in his closet, her shampoo in his shower. For years that was an unattainable goal, now it was reality, a sick reality. He knew it was wrong, but he wondered if Karen was worth trading in his longtime dream for a relationship with her.

"Shut up, you love her." He said to himself as he kicked at a stick.

"Yeah, but you don't love her like you do Pam. Will you ever be able to love her like that?"

He felt ridiculous arguing with himself but continued on anyway.

"Well all love is different... just because the love you have for Karen isn't the love you have for Pam, does that make it _wrong_?"

"It's not wrong, but clearly the love isn't as strong as it is for Pam."

"Give it time... we've known Pam for so long, you just have to give it time. The love for Karen will grow."

"What if it doesn't? What if it never comes and you look back at this night and wished you'd run back into the hospital and told Pam you love her and you want her?"

"This is ridiculous. We're going to get Pam well, and we're staying with Karen."

Jim stopped. He would have to get his thoughts in check if he was going to make it through this.

He walked back into the hospital, politely smiling at the nursing staff as he grabbed a grape soda from the machine and went back towards Pam's room.

He stopped just outside the door, peering inside. Pam lay in bed awake, staring at the chair in the corner where Jim had been sleeping. He watched her wipe a tear from her cheek and took a deep breath before heading in.

"Hey Beez, you ok?"

Pam smiled up at him and choked out. "I though you'd left me..."

"Hey, save your voice." Jim smiled and smoothed her curls. "I just went for a soda. I'm not going anywhere."

Pam smiled and nodded.

Jim sat on the edge of the bed, fiddling with the tab of his soda can. "I know this is going to be hard Pam. But we've made it this far." He whispered.

Pam fought the urge to grab his hand and squeeze it. She finally gave in and reached for his arm.

Jim laced his fingers with hers and sighed.

* * *

Jim watched as Pam anxiously signed her discharge papers. They had spent the day napping and playing cards, waiting to hear if and when Pam could be released. Finally at six thirty, she was cleared to go home.

Jim listened carefully as the nurse showed him how to keep Pam's surgical wounds clean, what she could eat for the next few days, and when to make a follow up appointment. Finally Pam was wheeled outside and Jim pulled the car around, helping her gently into the passenger seat.

When they arrived at Jim's building, he carried her inside and laid her on the couch. Colby immediately curled up next to Pam and purred contently as she softly stroked his fur.

Pam looked up at Jim and smiled. "He's always been a little skittish. He seems so at ease here." She squeaked out, her throat still sore.

"Good." Jim smiled. "Can I get you anything? Mark brought over lots of soups and popsicles today; I think he even mentioned some yogurt and pudding."

Pam smiled.

"You save your voice ok, you shouldn't be talking." Jim told her as he headed for the kitchen. "Besides, your eyes told me you're in the mood for a little mixed berry." He smiled as he appeared with the yogurt container and a spoon.

Pam mouthed a 'Thank you' and peeled back the lid.

Jim's pocket buzzed and Pam's heart fell. She knew the call would be coming, but it was still annoying when she heard Karen's ring.

"Hello?"

"Hey Halpert, I'm rolling into Scranton as we speak. Dinner ran late, so I got out of the city later than expected. You still at the hospital?"

Jim walked back toward his bedroom. "No, uh, actually Pam was released. We're at my place."

"Oh! How is Pam doing?"

"Better. She still can't talk much, and she's a little sore, but I'll be keeping up on her pain meds this week, so she should be alright."

"So...she's staying with you all week?" Karen asked softly.

"Yeah." Jim sighed. "Roy has a bail hearing tomorrow, and if he makes bail, I don't want her to be at her place, I don't think he knows where I live."

"I thought maybe her mother would be coming down." Karen sounded disappointed.

"No, Pam isn't ready to tell her mom just yet. I took the week off, so I figured I'd play nursemaid for her until she's up on her feet."

"Well what happens when you have to go back to work next week? It takes more than a week to recover from surgery."

"I haven't thought that far ahead yet, I've just been focused on this week."

"Well, you have to think about it Jim. I mean, it's really great what you're doing to help her through this, but she can't rely on you forever."

Jim sighed. "I know Karen. I know."

"I'm not trying to be a bitch; I'm trying to be realistic." Karen sighed.

"I know honey." Jim pinched the bridge of his nose, he knew she was right, but he didn't want to think about how things would be once they calmed down.

"I'm going to stop home and start some laundry, do you think it would be ok if I stopped by later?"

"Yeah, that'd be fine."

"Ok, see you in a bit Halpert. Love you."

"Love you too." Jim replied before hanging up.

Suddenly telling Karen he loved her made his stomach turn. He knew it wasn't a lie, but somehow he felt like he was lying to her when he said it.

He found Pam lying on the couch, Colby perched on her chest enjoy all the attention and head rubs he was getting.

"Can I get you some water or something?" Jim asked as he grabbed the empty yogurt container.

Pam nodded but didn't look at him.

Jim threw the container away and put his hands on the sink, sighing heavily. He didn't want to hurt Pam, and he hated that he was doing so. But they'd put it all out there, he'd been honest, and she was just going to have to accept that he was with Karen.

He grabbed a glass and filled with ice and water. He brought it out and set it on the coffee table.

"So, don't laugh." He smiled at her as he dug through his DVD stack by the television. "But I thought maybe you'd want to watch this." He grinned, holding up a copy of _Legally Blonde_.

Pam couldn't resist. She giggled as she sat up and nodded.

Halfway through the movie Pam sat on the floor in front of the couch, trying to get comfortable, but the ratty throw pillow wasn't providing much back support.

Jim grabbed the pillow and sat down next to her on the floor. He put the pillow against his chest and maneuvered Pam in front of him.

She sighed, finally comfortable enough to continue on with the movie as she leaned against Jim's chest, his arms gently hugging her against him.

* * *

Karen smiled to herself as she grabbed the bag from her front seat. She had purchased Jima and Pam both a few of those tacky _I heart NY_ shirts from a sleazy vendor on some random street corner. She'd washed them before she packed them up and headed for Jim's.

She made her way up the stairs and was about to knock when she peered through the open blinds next to Jim's door. A tear escaped her eye and a lump formed in her throat as she saw them sitting there on the floor.

She watched them for a few moments, trying to understand what she was witnessing. Her emotions ran the gamut and she peered through the blinds.

"Just friends huh?? _Friends my ASS_! That is not _JUST_ friends!"

"I should have known... I should have known... How could I be so stupid? How could I really think this was going to work?"

"How dare she? She knows he's with me! How could she do that to another woman? How could play this little game knowing that I would be the one that would get hurt? How can she be so heartless??"

"And HIM! How can he tell me he loves me and then literally go right to holding her in his arms? I thought he was better than that! I thought he was actually a good guy. I though I finally found a _good_ guy!"

It was too much for her to take in. She calmly set the back on the doorstep and quietly made her way back to her car.

She slammed the door and gripped the steering wheel. Tears streaming from her eyes.


	10. Chapter 10 fallible

**A/N - Ok, I am advancing the story more than I had planned for this point. But I got some news today, so I decided to get this moving and did a little re-write! I need to be induced early with my son for medical reasons, so he will coming into the world June 26th, should he cooperate, or should they decide to just take him via c-section (Which is a good possibility). So...I hope you enjoy this chapter!**

**Review and let me know how I did!**

* * *

Karen parked her car in front of her building but made no attempt to get out. She laid her seat back and stared at the stars through the sun roof.

"How could he do this to me?" She thought to herself.

"We talked about this over and over again, he said he liked her, he put it all out there, she rejected him and he moved on..."

"I should have known. I should have known something like this would happen. The way he looks at her, the way she stares at him, the way they act so nervous around each other. I should have seen this coming a million miles away!"

"What do I do now?" She rubbed her hands over her eyes and smoothed her hair. "I can't pretend like I didn't see them and let this go on behind my back! If I tell him, will he break it off with me? He sure as hell isn't going to send her home! It's like the sun rises and sets in her ass! God. Do I break up with him? Do I break it off and sit there everyday and watch them be together? How the hell am I supposed to do that?"

She sat her seat up and contemplated calling her sister. She decided against it, a lecture from her sister wouldn't make anything better. She pulled the keys out of the ignition and grabbed her purse before heading inside.

* * *

As the credits rolled Jim realized Pam had fallen asleep.

He clicked off the TV and closed his eyes. He took in the familiar smell of Pam and sighed. It was a little different, like he imagined it would be if they were together, watching movies on the lazy weekends, just happy to be together. It was the same smell of dove soap and flowery shampoo, but now there was no faint scent of toner or crisp paper.

She shifted a little in his arms and he hugged her a little tighter. He knew it was wrong, but he was like a kid with a fifty dollar bill, standing in a candy store. He'd always imagined a moment like this, and for the first time in two days he decided to throw caution to the wind and simply enjoy the moment.

He felt a tingle in his chest as he allowed himself the indulgence of the simple embrace, the smell of her skin, the warmth of her body, the calm of her breathing... letting himself take it all in. After a few minutes he drifted off to sleep, a smile on his face.

* * *

Karen threw her shoes in the closet and put on her pajamas. She tried to lie down and go to sleep, but thoughts of them kept her awake. The image burned in her mind, it was there every time she closed her eyes.

After nearly an hour she threw the covers back in frustration and clicked on the lamp. She didn't bother with getting dressed as she grabbed her shoes and purse.

He rushed out to her car, angry mounting in every step. She started the car and peeled out onto the street, heading for Jim's.

_"I was understanding. I trusted him. He betrayed me."_ She told herself as she pulled into the parking lot and made her way to the door.

* * *

Jim woke up and was confused by the weight on his chest. He looked down and smiled, remembering it was Pam against his chest.

"Pam."

"Hmmm?" Pam stirred a little.

"It's almost midnight, why don't we get you into bed?"

"Mmm...kay..." She struggled.

Jim carefully helped her up and led her down the hallway to the bedroom. He went back into the living room and shut down the lights, grabbing a bottle of water from the kitchen before heading back down the hall.

He offered Pam a sip of water and tucked her into the bed. He was walking out the door when he heard her whisper.

"Jim?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you stay here until I fall asleep?" She was hoarse, but speaking was a bit easier.

"Yeah." He answered with out thinking.

He crawled into the bed beside her, staying above the covers. Cuddling with Pam in his bed would be too much for him to handle and he knew it. He knew he would cross a line if he was given that chance.

"I know Roy is in jail, but I'm still scared." Her voice was small and shaky.

"Ok." He said simply and lay there, waiting for her to fall asleep.

* * *

Karen climbed the stairs, determination in every step she took. She stopped to knock, but held back. She fuddled with her key chain and found the spare key Jim had given her just a week before. She quietly slipped the key into the lock and let herself in.

She shut the door softly and walked over to the couch, expecting to see a form. When she saw the couch empty she grit her teeth. She slipped off her shoes and headed down the hallway, seeing a small light coming from Jim's room.

She stood in the doorway staring at the bed. Jim was asleep, his arm haphazardly slung over Pam's small body.

She turned to leave but stopped herself. It was now or never.

"Jim!" She said in a loud whisper.

Jim moved a little but remained asleep.

"James Halpert." She said a little louder.

Jim rolled over and rubbed his eyes, looking up at her. "Hey Kare"

She'd had enough. "_Using my nickname while in bed with another woman? How dare he?"_ She thought as she made her way to the living room.

"Karen!" Jim followed her out. "I know how this looks!"

"Oh do you?" Karen turned around abruptly. "And I suppose you have a way to explain it away!"

"She was scared."

"Of what? _Me?_ She _should_ be!"

"No, of Roy..."

"Roy is in jail. This is the safest she's been in years."

"She was scared; I don't know what else to tell you."

"Oh really?" Karen put her hands on her hips. "And was she scared when you were cuddling on the floor a few hours ago?"

Jim could feel the blood rush to his cheeks.

"Oh yeah, I saw your little display! I was coming over to give you two gifts from the city and boy did I ever get a present! My boyfriend canoodling on the floor with his long time love!"

"C'mon Karen, don't do this."

"No Jim, don't give me that shit. I've been understanding, more understanding than most women would be in my position in fact, and you took advantage of that!"

"No! I didn't!" Jim shouted back.

"Yes you did!" Karen yelled. "If you're still in love with her you should have been straight forward with me! Seeing you two with my own eyes was a thousand times worse than you just telling me! Being honest with me! I have always been honest with you; I guess I was stupid for expecting the same!"

"Don't say that, you're not stupid Karen."

"Oh really?" She stopped. "Ya know what? You're right. I'm not stupid. I was duped!" She growled as she started looking for her shoes.

"I didn't try to deceive you in any way Karen! I didn't!"

"Well whether or not it was intentional, you did!" She threw her shoes on and headed to the door, Jim cut her off.

"Don't leave here angry Karen." He begged her.

"I'm just plain leaving." Karen sighed.

"What?"

"This isn't going to work Jim. The trust is gone. I can't..."

"Don't do this." Tears formed in his eyes.

"Jim. This isn't going to work. I'm leaving."

"Karen..."

"Goodbye Jim." Karen opened the door, stopping just outside. "Have a good future with Pam." She spat before heading back down the stairs.

Jim thought about going after her, but he didn't have it in him. He was emotionally exhausted. He slowly closed the door and leaned his head against the frame, turning around when heard a sniffle behind him.

Pam was standing at the end of the hall, tears streaming down her face.

"Oh Pam..."

"I ruin everyone's lives..." She whispered.

"Don't say that." Jim whispered, wrapping her in a hug.

"Go after her." Pam whispered.

"No." Jim said firmly. "She's gone. I'm not getting her back."

Pam sobbed into his chest as he pulled her in closer.


	11. Chapter 11 Abrupt

**A/N - Ok, here we go JAM fans... a turn of events you may like. I had to rush this chapter out, so I'm sorry for any typos. My daughter has thursday and friday off school, so tomorrow's chapter will be the last for the week, and I havent even started it yet! Anything you guys would like me to include?? If so, click that little button asap and leave a review tonight!**

* * *

Pam rolled over as the sun hit her face, she sat up, surprised to feel someone next to her in the bed.

A smiled teased her lips when she watched Jim lost in sleep. She reached over him to grab her bottle of water and carefully took a sip.

After the initial sting she gulped a few more swallows and replaced the cap. She leaned against the headboard and sighed when she remembered the events of the night before.

_She'd been lying in bed, smiling to herself as Jim lay snuggled next to her. She heard footsteps down the hallway and her breath caught in her throat. She was surprised when she heard Karen's voice calling out for Jim. She immediately closed her eyes and pretended to be asleep. Karen called for Jim again and she felt him sit up beside her. _

_Jim took off after Karen and Pam padded to the door, listening to the fight in the living room. She bit her lip as she realized how unfair everything had been to Karen. As much as she wanted Jim, he belonged to Karen. She had told Jim how she felt with no regard for Karen's feelings and had even been angry with Karen, all because Jim chose to stay with her. Karen had moved to another state to be with him, kept her job with a struggling mid sized paper company, instead of moving on to bigger and better things. And Pam didn't care about any of those things, she wanted Jim and didn't care who she had to hurt to get what she wanted._

_The guilt washed over her and she slipped out into the hallway, intending to go out and apologize to Karen, ready to save Jim's relationship. She watched as Karen told him it was over. Watched as she spat the name Pam as if it were poison. _

_She cried into Jim's chest until there were no more tears to cry. She laid in the bed and apologized to him over and over again until she fell asleep._

She looked over at Jim sleeping next to her. She thought he would have surely slept on the couch. How could he sleep next to the woman who just cost him his girlfriend?

After a few minutes, Jim stirred, rubbing the sun out of his eyes as he stretched in the bed.

"Hey Beez." He smiled.

"Hey." She whispered back.

"You must be starving." He smiled. "I'll scramble you some eggs, but the doc said no salt or pepper...So you'll have to make do with plain." He grinned as he got up and wandered out towards the kitchen.

Pam stared at the door with wide eyes.

"Why is he pretending last night didn't happen?" She wondered as she threw the covers back and wiggled her toes into her slippers.

She walked down the hall and peeked over the breakfast bar into the kitchen. She watched as Jim cracked a few eggs into a bowl and scrambled them with a fork. He placed the bowl on the counter and started to whistle as he pulled a pan from the cupboard and set it on the stove to warm up. He continued to whistle as he pulled a package of cream cheese from the fridge and added a chunk to the egg mix. He started mixing in the cheese when he saw Pam standing there, staring at him.

"What?" He smiled, pouring the mixture into the pan.

"So, are we not talking about this? Pretending it didn't happen?" Pam croaked as she sat on a stool.

"You shouldn't be talking period." Jim laughed. "You sound like shit, and you should be saving your voice. The nurse said you should be talking as little as possible for the next few days."

Pam cocked her head to the side and glared at Jim.

"Ok, so not the time to be funny, but in case you haven't noticed, I use humor to relieve tension."

Pam nodded.

"Listen. I know Karen..." he started as he moved the eggs around in the pan with a spatula. "This isn't something we'd be able to bounce back from. Even if she wanted to stay with me, she'd be miserable. She wouldn't be one to give an ultimatum, and I couldn't choose her over you anyway..." His voice faded as he spoke.

Pam couldn't believe her ears. She stared at Jim, not knowing what to say. Thankfully he continued to talk as he cooked.

"I betrayed her trust." He shook her head. "I can't go back to her and ask her to trust me again..." He paused. "I can't lie to her... because the truth is, I don't trust myself."

Tears formed in Pam's eyes.

"I can't trust myself being around you... I can't trust myself not to fall into the old habits... I can't trust myself knowing now that you love me back... I can't trust myself being this close to you...and not making it into something more..."

Pam was silent. She closed her eyes and tried to take in the moment. In the past she would sometimes let her imagination run free, without her holding it back and she would picture a time when she would be what Jim wanted, and she would be able to give her heart to him.

In her mind's eye, it was never like this. Her sitting at his breakfast bar, broken inside and out, stealing him away from someone else.

The sound of a plate hitting the counter top startled her and she opened her eyes. Jim handed her a fork and she looked down at the steaming pile of scrambled eggs as Jim poured her a glass of milk.

He set the glass in front of her and gave a small smile. "I'm going to shower and get changed."

He walked out of the kitchen and stopped behind her stool. He leaned in and moved her hair away from ear, sending shivers down her spine. "I never imagined it would be this way either." He whispered before heading into the bathroom.

Pam sat there, stunned and unable to move. He knew her better than she ever thought anyone would know her, and it was almost scary at times.

She listened as he started the shower and she slowly dug her fork into the eggs, wondering what would happen next.

* * *

Pam lay on the couch, watching as Jim went about the morning.

He carefully scooped Colby's litter box and refilled his food and water. He gave him a tiny saucer of wet food and brought the garbage out to the dumpster. He loaded the dishwasher and mopped the kitchen, keeping himself busy with household chores.

Pam's heart jumped into her throat as she watched Jim gather up the laundry and mixed her laundry in as if it was an old habit. The image of her t-shirts crumpled next to his in the basket was too much to take and the tears spilled onto her cheeks.

Jim walked by the couch on his way out the door to the laundry room, but instantly dropped the basket when he saw Pam crying. He knelt beside the couch and smoothed her hair.

"What's wrong?" he asked softly.

"Nothing." Pam whispered, shaking her head.

"Oh come on..." Jim smiled.

"It's just... you put my laundry in with yours."

Jim looked at the spilled basket behind him. "I'm sorry I should have asked..."

"No..." Pam shook her head. "It's so stupid..."

Jim cocked his head in confusion.

"It's just...it looks so funny ya know? You just did it without thinking... it's...strange, but sweet." She whispered.

She closed her eyes as Jim leaned in and softly kissed her forehead.

"I don't know what I'm doing here Beez..." He whispered his breath warm on her skin. "But, with Roy and everything..." Pam tensed at the mention of his name, but Jim continued on. "I think you should move in here." He exhaled.

Pam looked up into his eyes, wondering if she heard right.

"I know this is... Insane..." He laughed. "Considering the circumstances... but I need to get you safe and we can figure out the rest as it comes."

Pam nodded slowly.

"I'll leave your 30 day notice when I go get the rest of your stuff...at least you only have a month to month lease." He smiled and got up, gathered the laundry and made his way out the door.

Pam sat there, stunned. She knew it was crazy, he'd just broken up with Karen less than 12 hours ago and now she was moving in. As crazy as it was, it still felt right. She pulled herself off the couch and went into the kitchen to make herself a cup of tea.

* * *

Jim closed the washer and dispensed the quarters. The hum of the machine nearly drowning the sound of his cell phone ringing in his pocket. He fished it out and answered it without looking at the caller ID.

"Hello?"

"Uh hey... is this a bad time?" Karen asked softly.

Jim sat on the small chair next to the dryer. "Uh, no...I can talk."

"Hey, I just wanted to let you know I talked to Wallace, I got a transfer to Utica."

"Oh..."

"Yeah, I mean rumor has it that the Regional Manager is on his way out, and I figure I can slide in there and maybe move up in the company in a couple months."

"Yeah, that would be good."

"But hey, I have a truck coming tonight, I'm gonna load up and head out there... my sister is going to let me stay with her for a week, before I start the new position. I know its short notice... but I have that armoire and the couch... and I'll need some help..."

"Oh..." Jim was a bit shocked by her request.

"I can understand if you're busy, or whatever, but if you don't help me, I'm going to have to ask Dwight or Michael, and I don't want to do that..."

"I don't blame you." Jim laughed.

"Actually, I could use your help, if you don't mind. I want to load up Pam's stuff, maybe I can rent a truck too..."

"You can just use mine... we'll move her stuff over to your place, and then come back and load up my stuff."

"Ok..." Jim started but stopped suddenly.

"Jim, I'm not stupid." Karen whispered. "And you have that big extra bedroom that only houses your computer... I figured it would be the logical choice for you two right now..."

"Karen..."

"Jim, don't. We don't have to do this. We can be pleasant for tonight; we don't have to talk about this."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I mean why beat a dead dog?"

He sighed.

"I'll call you after I pick up the truck ok?"

"Oh, yeah..."

"See ya later."

"Bye." Jim clicked his phone shut and shook his head.

_"This has to be the most insane weekend anyone in Scranton has ever had."_ He thought to himself as he walked back up to his apartment.


	12. Chapter 12 Revelation

**A/N - Ok this chapter propels our story forward a little bit... JAM fans should be happy to see Karen load up and drive to Utica.**

**I will not be posting chapter 13 until Monday. Enjoy the rest of your week and have a good weekend Guys!**

**Reviews make me happy and in turn, makes baby Logan happy...So drop us a line, get a free baby kick!**

* * *

"Hey." Jim smiled as he sat next to Pam on the couch. "I just got off the phone with Karen."

Pam looked up, a bit confused.

"She transferred to Utica, and she wants to pack up tonight. We're gonna use her truck and move your stuff here, into the extra bedroom. Then I am going to help her load up so she can leave for New York."

Pam nodded, still slightly confused.

"I'm going to have Mark come here and sit with you while I'm gone... is that going to be ok?"

"Yeah." Pam nodded.

"You sure?"

"Yeah." She smiled.

"Are you sure you're ok with all of this? I know this is a big decision. Maybe you should think it over a little more..."

Pam grinned. "I knew you'd say that." She said getting up, handing him a notebook. "I'm gonna shower and get dressed." She whispered and disappeared down the hall.

Jim watched her for a moment, then began reading the words Pam had given him.

_Jim,_

_I know the decision for me to move in with you seems very sudden. But I have to tell you I have fantasized about moving in with you since the night you told me you were in love with me. I moved out of the apartment I shared with Roy and into my own place a month later, and I spent many nights where I would let my imagination go and I would imagine you standing next to me as I prepared dinner. I know this sounds incredibly pathetic, but I would tell you about my day as I cooked. It always made me feel close to you, despite the miles between us._

_When I would go to bed at night, I would leave you room on the right side of the bed. When the nights seemed too long, I bought a body pillow and used it as a surrogate for you. Then you returned with Karen, and the fantasy seemed like an impossible dream. When you asked me to move in today, I just about jumped out of my skin. I'm not the girl whose dreams come true, and yet here I am sitting in our apartment. OUR apartment._

_I can't wait to stand in the kitchen and laugh about our pranks on Dwight, whine over Michael's latest scheme, and maybe even argue about which movie to watch that evening. I can't wait to throw that body pillow into the garbage and then turn and slip into bed next to you. I can't wait to see what life is like with you by my side. _

_This may seem like it is sudden, but for us it isn't. This moment has been years in the making, and though we skipped over a few steps to get here, we can make up for that time together. I am in love with you, and I will take any chance I can to be with you and to show you that my love is very real. I don't want to lose you again._

_I love you,_

_Pam_

_PS- We do need to talk about redecorating this place though. I'm sorry, but I cant sit here every night with Mario Lemieux staring at me._

Jim wiped the tears from his eyes and smiled. She was right. This moment was years in the making. He stood up and carefully peeled Mario off the wall.

* * *

Pam grinned as she beat Mark at scrabble for the third time in a row.

"I think I'm too dumb for this game." Mark laughed as he cleared off the game board.

"My mom loves this game, I play a lot." Pam croaked out.

"So, I see number sixty-six has been taken down." Mark shook his head.

Pam looked up at the wall to see Jim's posters gone. "Mario will have a place in the extra bedroom, I promise." She smiled as she got up for more tea.

"You guys will have some fun rearranging I'm sure." Mark laughed. "Be sure you replace this couch with yours, Jim's had this since college."

"Yeah, I think I'm going to convince him to have the Salvation Army pick this up." Pam smiled.

"So you seem pretty comfortable here." Mark said, picking up Colby as he wandered by. "And so does the little guy."

"Jim just loves Colby, and Colby loves Jim right back." Pam whispered.

"Jim just loves Pam, and me thinks Pam loves him right back." Mark grinned.

Pam blushed and sat down on the couch.

"Pam, can we be frank?" Mark asked cautiously.

"Yeah." Pam chewed her lip slightly.

"Jim loves you, and he has for years."

Pam nodded.

"When you turned him down last year, his spirit was broke. He just wasn't the same. He took off and left us all behind, because he couldn't face you marrying Roy. I know he still loves you, and I know you love him and care for him deeply."

Pam nodded and wiped away a tear.

"But please, this cant be a game. You have to know this is right; you have to know he is the one you want to be with. You have to know because Pam, if he looses you again, I don't know what's going to happen to him. Please don't hurt him again."

Pam closed her eyes as the tears streaked down. "I won't." She whispered. "I promise I wont."

* * *

Jim and Karen worked in silence. Karen carefully wrapped Pam's belongings in newspaper and filled boxes, while Jim carried boxes out. Before long the back of the truck was full and Pam's apartment was empty.

"So, you ready?" Karen asked, tossing him the keys to the truck.

"Yeah let's get this unloaded and get you loaded up so you can get out of here at a decent hour." Jim nodded and jumped in the truck.

The ride was quiet. He heard Karen inhale and he tensed up.

"So Roy can't make bail until Friday." Karen said softly.

"How do you know that?" Jim asked.

"I had to fill out a change of address form at the post office this afternoon. I stopped by the courthouse and sat in on the bail hearing."

"Oh." Jim was surprised.

"I overheard Kenny and their mom saying they couldn't make the number until Friday, they made an appointment with the bail bondsman for Friday afternoon. So Pam won't have to worry about him until then, but you may want to call the county clerks office to see about a restraining order in the mean time."

Jim nodded. "Thanks..."

"I know this situation is ugly...but I figure we'll see each other around, since I am staying on with Dunder Mifflin, I don't want things to be unpleasant forever Jim. Life's too short."

"I appreciate it." Jim told her as they pulled into the parking lot.

* * *

Mark, Jim and Karen made short work of unloading the truck, within an hour the spare bedroom was full and Pam officially lived there.

Jim pulled Pam aside and kissed her forehead. "Don't try unpacking; your stitches need to heal." He told her, his hand skimming her stomach gently.

Pam nodded softly and hugged him. "Go, I'll see you when you get home."

Jim kissed her head again and left to join Karen in the truck.

The ride to Karen's was quiet. Karen had most of her things packed and the loading was quick work.

They stood there in the street behind the loaded truck, one not sure what to say to the other.

Karen jiggled her keys and shuffled her feet.

"Jim. I wish you happiness." She said softly before making her way to the cab of the truck.

"You too." Jim called after her. "Drive safe."

He watched as the truck pulled out and down the street. He waited for the tail lights to disappear over the horizon before getting into his car and heading home.

Pam would be waiting for him.


	13. Chapter 13 Lamentation

**A/N - Ok guys, I had much more in mind for this story, but alas, real life has butted in! I am having a c section on thursday morning, and I want to wrap up all my stories by tomorrow evening. Perhaps once I'm back into the swing of things, I will re-write this at a later time. ****In the mean time, I promise you all an epilogue tomorrow. Thank to everyone who has stuck this through with me, and to those of you who have reviewed and PM's me. Think of me on thursday morning!!**

**Reviews will help keep my mind off being sliced open on thursday... :)**

* * *

Jim pulled into his garage and sat there for a few minutes, hands still on the steering wheel. He thought for a moment and pulled back out and down the street.

He found a parking spot near the door and parked the car. He grabbed a basket near the entrance and strode up and down the aisles of the small market; occasionally dropping an item into the basket.

Soon his hand grew tired and he looked down at the heaping basket. He smiled at the boxes of tea, mixed berry yogurts, grape soda, bread, deli ham, canned cat food, and pudding. He grabbed a carton of ice cream and snatched a bouquet of Roses near the check out before heading home.

Mark informed him that Pam had gone to bed, and the friends shook hands as they parted ways. Jim busied himself with putting away the groceries, unaware that Pam was peeking at him over the breakfast bar.

Colby purred and rubbed against Jim's legs as he stood at the counter, pouring himself a grape soda.

"Hey buddy." Jim smiled, picking up the small cat. "What you doing?"

Colby purred louder and snuggled against Jim's chest. Jim carried him in one hand and his grape soda in the other as he made his way into the living room. "Can I tell you a secret buddy?"

Pam pulled back into the hallway a bit, not wanting to be spotted as she eavesdropped.

"I'm very happy to have you and your mommy here." Jim told the cat as he softly stroked his fur. "But I'm kinda scared too... Mommy and I haven't had the best track record when we've attempted to be together, and I want everything to go smoothly this time."

Pam leaned against the wall and closed her eyes, the truth of Jim's words making her stomach jump.

"But, I think if we're gonna make it, this is going to be our best shot." Jim whispered to the now sleeping kitten.

It was silent for a few moments and Pam decided to sneak back into the bedroom. As she leaned up from the wall, she felt a bit dizzy and reached out for to catch her balance, knocking the picture off the wall in the process. She cursed silently as the frame hit the ground with a thud and she yelped as she leaped out of the way, not wanting the picture to fall over onto her foot.

Instantly Jim was there, a worried expression across his face. "Pam! Are you ok?"

"Yeah, just dizzy." She whispered, looking up into his eyes.

"You ok now?" Jim reached out and touched her shoulder.

"Yeah." Pam nodded.

"Let's get you back to bed." Jim smiled and took her arm as they went down the hall.

Once back in bed, Pam snuggled in and looked up at Jim, a smile painted across her face.

"What is that look Beesly?" Jim laughed as he sat on the edge of the bed.

"I think everything should go smoothly this time... once we get over a few more obstacles." She whispered.

"Ahhhh, so you were eavesdropping!" Jim laughed. "That was a private conversation I was having with Colby I'll have you know."

"Yeah, Colbs and I have had a few of those too." Pam squeaked out.

"I want us to make it Pam... I do... these last couple of days have put us through the ringer. I want to fix all of this and make a good go of it." He told her.

"I know Jim." Pam smiled. "You were right you know. We've had a bit of a rocky road..." She paused for a moment. "But, it got us to this point, so I'm ready to take on anything that comes our way."

"Good." Jim reached out and smoothed her hair. "You get some sleep, we're going to get up early and go get a restraining order, Roy won't be out until Friday, so we have time."

Pam nodded softly, her throat throbbing. "Could I trouble you for some water?" She asked, coughing and grimacing as she spoke.

"Of course." Jim smiled and went into the kitchen, handing her a bottle of water.

Pam quickly mouthed a 'thank you' and greedily gulped down the water.

"Whoa...you don't wet the bed do ya?" Jim asked as she finished the bottle.

Pam giggled as she shook her head no. She stopped and looked up at Jim, butterflies in her stomach.

Jim cocked his head when he saw the expression on her face. "What?"

"Nothing." Pam whispered. "It's just... While you were gone, Mark and I walked out to the dumpster and threw out the body pillow.

Jim smiled and clicked out the light, crawling in bed next to her.

* * *

Jim watched quietly as Pam filled out the forms for her restraining order, his sitting in his lap, already finished.

Pam's hand shook slightly as she wrote, and that wasn't lost on Jim. He reached out and gently laid his hand on hers.

"It's ok." he whispered softly.

Pam nodded and breathed deeply for a few moments. Jim lifted his hand from hers and she wrote again, this time with a steady hand.

Jim held her hand as they exited the courthouse, their confidence growing with every step. They decided to stop for milkshakes and they sat in the car, silently enjoying their frozen treats.

"Jim?" Pam looked over at Jim who was busy watching a father and son playing basketball across the street.

"Hmm?"

"You'll teach our kids to play basketball right?"

Jim's stomach flipped. He looked over at Pam, a small smile on his lips, and a stray tear in his eye. "Yeah. I will." He nodded.

"Good." She took another sip of her malt. "Because I'm about at uncoordinated as they come."

"But you can teach them how to draw and paint." Jim smiled. "You have more artistic talent in you little finger than I do in my entire body."

Pam smiled and then bit her lip.

"What?"

"Nothing." She smiled. "I can't believe I'm sitting here talking to you about having kids."

"Yeah..." Jim shook his head. "We're moving at lightening speed aren't we?"

Pam nodded. "I'm ok with that."

"Good." Jim grinned.

They enjoyed the last of their malts as they watched the passersby.

* * *

Pam sat on the couch sketching Colby as he slept in the new glider in the corner. She stopped and looked around the apartment. It had only been a few months since she'd moved in with Jim, but the apartment looked completely different than it had when she hastily moved in.

They'd decided to let the Salvation Army take all of their old furniture and had spent an entire Saturday shopping for new furniture. After nearly five hours they were watching delivery men drop off the new merchandise.

Pam's sketches and water colors adorned the walls. She told Jim that they didn't need to be displayed but he'd insisted on framing and hanging his favorite pieces.

She heard a key in the door and she got up to great Jim.

"Hey!" She smiled as he opened the door. Her face fell when she saw the worried look on his face. "What's the matter?" She asked.

Jim closed the door and slipped off his sports coat and tossed his messenger bag onto the floor.

"I have bad news." He said softly. "Maybe you should sit down."

Pam slowly sat in the armchair near the window.

"Pam." Jim started. "Something happened to Roy this morning."

Pam instantly tensed at the mention of his name.

"He was driving drunk. He took out a minivan, caused a big wreck."

Pam swallowed the lump in her throat. As much as she hated him she hadn't wished him harm.

"The other driver is in serious condition, but expected to make it."

"What...what about Roy?" Pam choked.

"He didn't make it Pam, I'm sorry."

Pam sat silent. She stopped when she realized she'd expected to cry, but she didn't shed a tear. "His poor mother, she doesn't deserve to go through this." She whispered.

Jim walked over and bent down, softly putting his arms around her. "It's ok if you don't feel bad about this." He whispered.

Pam shot him an angry look. "I didn't wish him dead!"

"I know honey." Jim's voice was steady and calm.

"I just...I don't know how I should handle this." She whispered.

"I know." Jim leaned in and kissed her forehead softly. "What do you need from me?"

Pam looked down at him, softly touching her forehead to his. "I want to lie down... Can we lie down?"

"Yeah." Jim whispered as he led her down the hallway.

They lay on the bed for nearly an hour, neither of them saying a word. Pam finally lifted herself up and smoothed her pants.

"Dinner?" She asked quietly.

"I'll make some grilled cheese." Jim whispered as he got up and went into the kitchen.

Pam sighed. She loved how well Jim knew her; she walked into the bathroom and closed the door. She slid to the floor and let the tears go.

Jim stood out in the hallway for a few minutes. The sounds of Pam's sobs made his heart break, but he knew she needed this time alone.

He scooped up Colby and made his way to the kitchen.

* * *

Jim sat in the car, watching the funeral home doors. A few moments later Pam emerged, gently drying the tears from her face. She got in the car and stayed silent. Jim patted her leg gently as he pulled away.

They ate their meal in silence. Pam picked at her salad as Jim slowly ate his steak. They were silent through dinner and he grabbed her hand as they left the restaurant.

When they got home, Jim led her to the bedroom and waited while she changed. Pam crawled into bed, in her pajamas, and Jim lay silently next to her.

"Jim?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

He reached over and kissed her head gently before they both fell asleep.


	14. Chapter 14 Ultimately

**A/N - Ok - Sorry I made you wait a day for the tiny little epi! I had some false labor yesterday, and after they sent me home, I napped all day. :)**

**So here is the happy ending we JAM fans like to have... I hope it isnt too fluffy considering the angsty story you just read!**

**Tomorrow is baby day! Some reviews will help me keep my mind off it!! hint, hint, nudge, nudge!**

* * *

Jim rubbed the sweat off his hands. Tonight marked the one year anniversary of Pam moving in with him, and changing his world forever.

He looked around the apartment; he'd rearranged everything at least four times already. There were candles and rose petals all over, the coffee table was stacked with vases, holding a total of three hundred and sixty five pink roses.

He'd become the number two at the office, and had sealed three major accounts in the last three months, enough to ensure the branch would not be falling under any time soon. Pam had found a job at local art gallery. It wasn't exactly full time and didn't pay well, but he'd never seen Pam happier in all the years he'd known her.

Hey heard a key in the door and he stood quickly, smoothing out his jacket. Pam had been at an art show and he'd feigned sickness to stay home and plan his surprise.

Pam walked in and her eyes grew huge as she saw the roses and the candles.

"Happy moving in with me anniversary!" Jim smiled as he walked over and took her hand.

"Oh...Jim..." She breathed softly.

He led her to the couch and sat next to her, her hands still inside his.

"Pam, I love you more than life itself. I never thought I could love anyone the way I love you."

Pam's heart caught in her throat.

"I know we've had a tough year, but we made it through it all together. The night you moved in here changed my life forever. It was never the way I expected you to end up in my arms, but I do know that I never want you to leave them."

Pam wiped a tear from her cheek.

"Colby! Come see mom!" Jim called out.

Pam was confused for a moment but greeted Colby and he jumped up on the couch.

"Hey baby... what do you have here?" She smiled, twirling the ribbon Jim had tied around his collar. "Oh my God..."

Jim smiled as he watched Pam move the diamond ring around her fingers. He reached over and untied the ribbon, releasing the ring into the palm of his hand.

He stood up, only to kneel down. He held the ring out in front of him as his eyes filled with tears.

"Pam, I love you, I can't imagine my life without you." His voice started to crack as he spoke.

"Before I met you I was simply existing, you have made me so incredibly happy and have changed my life in ways I never expected. I never want to know what life is like without you again." He paused, wiping the tears from his face. "Will you marry me?"

Pam sat there shocked, tears flowing freely. She quickly nodded and Jim slipped the ring onto her finger.

"I love you..." She whispered as she leaned in and kissed him gently.

"I love you more." Jim's lips smiled against hers.

He knew it wouldn't be _happily ever after_ but it would be damn close.


End file.
